Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-And Then My Fluish Head Was Crushed With Cuteness

I received an email from my good friend today accompanied by a couple of photos. At that moment my heart squished with sweetness no cat crushing could ever achieve today, day 6 of NO EATING DUE TO RELENTLESS NAUSEA. So I pass it on to you. I take the write-up with a grain of salt as you just never can trust The Internet entirely. But the photos are weep worthy.

***UPDATE***an astute reader passed this link to me that may just explain what these photos represent. See for yourself.

"In a zoo in California, a mother tiger gave birth to a rare set of triplet tiger cubs. Unfortunately, due to complications in the pregnancy, the cubs were born prematurely and due to their tiny size, they died shortly after birth. The mother tiger after recovering from the delivery, suddenly started to decline in health, although physically she was fine. The veterinarians felt that the loss of her litter had caused the tigress to fall into a depression. The doctors decided that if the tigress could surrogate another mother's cubs, perhaps she would improve. After checking with many other zoos across the country, the depressing news was that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment.
Sometimes a mother of one species will take on the care of a different species. The only "orphans" that could be found quickly, were a litter of wiener pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in tiger skin and placed the babies around the mother tiger."


Take a look...

Sickening

Sorry I haven't posted recently but I have suddenly came down with a nasty tummy flu. I feel like ass. Hopefully I'll be more cognizant of my surroundings in a couple days. Hope you all are well.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Scary New Smells

We're moving on up!
To the top!
To that deluxe apartment in the sky!

I am packing up Yoshi and moving out of my Hovel From Hell. I got the great news yesterday that I have been accepted as a tenant in a brand new artists’ building in a very fancy part of town I normally could never afford to live in. My new pad is about 40% larger with a proper kitchen and I even have closets and storage. I also have a balcony with a lovely view of all the boats in the marina. Can you imagine the difference between a brand spanking new architectural wonder and the 100 year old firetrap I have been living in over the last six years? A sparkly clean never been used before kitchen and bathroom -I am feeling all tingly about that part too. It is a concrete building which means I can actually experience the sensation of soundproofing and will no longer be woken every morning at 5:15 am by the sound of my upstairs neighbour pissing. No more wild parties and thundering video games from the frat boys downstairs. No more laziness and passive aggressive behavior from the caretaker, The Reign Of Terry. No more raccoons pooping on my fire escape.

I will admit I will miss the Ol’ Dumpster a little bit as I have made it my own with funky paint colours and a collection of perfectly fitting eclectic furniture. My future walls are beige. The carpets are beige. But I have in-suite laundry so I can suffer through. It is a little sad as my next-door neighbour/friend and I have been working on the front yard adding flowers and shrubs and many an hour has been spent out there pulling weeds and cutting back out-of-control foliage. It was just starting to look nice and we would get compliments from passer-by every time we were out there. There will be no more bitchy gossip sessions about how we are going to take over the house and make it a clean and fabulous place we know it could be.

Honestly, I gave up. I am sick of being embarrassed to have people over. I am sick of eating off my coffee table and not having the room for craft projects or having dinner guests or even falling into my furniture when doing yoga. I hate the shoddy hallways and dirty front porch and filthy carpets. I loathe the cottage cheese textured walls and ceilings. My new place is all smooth and clean and fresh.

I am also nice and high up on the 6^th floor away from car exhaust and noise. My fridge is full sized and I have a proper stove and oven. My bathroom will actually be in my apartment. I don’t have to share a bathroom but mine is located across the hall right now in this weird and ancient house. How many times have I been caught out in my PJs by my neighbours when dashing to the loo or with spikey wet hair fresh from the shower? So many times I am not really even embarrassed any more when it happens.

I no longer will be blowing fuses when I use two appliances at once. I am now a grown up.

And The Artist Is....

Well. Nobody got the artist right although some guesses were closer than others. Let me tell you who the artist is who painted this picture.

Orachai The Elephant

Yes, the painting was created by an elephant.

I honestly didn’t believe it at first but my cousin saw it with her own eyes and videoed it in person at the Mae Taeng Elephant Park in Chiang Mai, Thailand last November. She has proof. An elephant really did it.

Isn’t that the coolest thing EVER!??!!

So if you said it was a cat/Yoshi (like Circe, Twisted Uterus, Sheryl, and Kerri) you were partially right as cats and elephants are animals. If you were Ladybug and said a penis did it you were kinda right as it was a longish appendage that held the brush. Since nobody guessed correctly I will donate the prize money to The Elephant Sanctuary in Hohenwald Tennessee.

Random Thoughts, Updates and a Contest

-I have decided I have a crush on Anderson Cooper. He is smart, passionate about what he does, dashingly handsome and totally gay. Typical guy I fall for. I knew it was lurve when I saw him on CNN interviewing the governor (I think) of Louisiana during the first days of Hurricane Katrina. She was blah blah blahing some platitude about how help was coming and he, right on the air, ripped her a new asshole. Did anybody see it? Anderson was obviously physically exhausted and emotionally distraught and very PISSED OFF and totally gave her shit about how people were, um, DYING on the streets while politicians passed the buck. It was beautiful and from that moment on my heart was his.

-I watched for the second time the fabulous Canadian documentary ‘The Corporation'. This little film is totally mind blowing and you will never shop at The Gap, drink Coke/Pepsi, watch Fox, or eat McDonalds with an easy mind ever again. HIGHLY recommend it.

-On a serious note I grew myself some eggs and tracked down and phoned my recently deceased ex-boyfriend’s sister. She was very kind and it turns out he died in a motorcycle accident. Totally not his fault as a van pulled out in front of him. So there you go. I have gotten over the shock and feel good about being able to express my sympathy to the family. I gave her my number in case my ex-friend (the wife) wants to talk to me. I doubt that will happen but I wanted to show that I was a big girl and not harboring any grudges. Never mind that I was super nervous and literally shaking the whole time I was on the phone.

-I got a wonderful painting as a gift from my cousin the other day and I just hung it in its new frame on my wall tonight. It is the coolest painting I have ever seen and I totally cherish it.

AND HERE IS THE CONTEST!!!

The first person who can identify the artist of my new painting will be sent a really cool prize. I am not going to tell you what the prize is as it is really too cool to talk about but rest assured, you will not regret expending the energy to type in a guess.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Banger

Yoshi in the hood. Yo!

Really Red

Today I found myself doing something I never dreamed I would ever have to do.

I had to return a toilet seat. A used toilet seat. To the store where I bought it.

It wouldn’t stay attached to the toilet properly and tried to buck me off.

They were very good about it.

Tight Pants

What a day. I have been so uninspired lately which really makes no sense. I am feeling stronger and the sun has been shining so in theory I should be bursting with energy. Except I am not. Today I really had to iron a bunch of clothes but I laid on the couch, farted around on the computer and chatted on the phone instead. ALL DAY!!! The only thing that inspired me to get up, get dressed and get out was to drive through the take-out window of Wendy’s for a large Frostie. I REALLY needed a Frostie. Like NOW.

I treat PMS like a mugging. Just do what it says and nobody will get hurt.

Hugs and Kisses

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

This last year has been a tough one and I cannot thank you enough for being there for me. Thank you for shaving my head. Thank you for sitting with me for my chemos and then staying the night. Thank you for cooking me special meals to tempt my nauseous tummy. Thank you for going to billions of doctor appointments with me. Thank you for cleaning and doing laundry and shopping and running errands for me when I was too tired to do it myself. Thank you for listening to all my symptoms and ailments in gory detail. Being a mom is hard enough but I think it is that much harder to take care of a very sick child. Well, I am not a kid anymore but I know I will always be your child. So thank you, Mom.

XXOO

Mom at a chemo appointment with me.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Have Even I Gone Too Far?

She was supposed to look like Cher but instead resembles a hung over drag queen.

Still Fresh

I wrote this post last year when I was just at the start of my cancer treatment journey. I was aware then that I was very grateful that I lived in Canada and that my care would be covered even though my work didn’t offer any extended health benefits. I had admitted to doubts that at maybe my care could have come a little faster but now that I am on the other side of it all I can say with complete confidence that my treatment was excellent. My doctors were caring. The nurses and technicians were wonderful without exception. Because I had to go on disability as I could not work all my prescription medications were 100% covered by the government. Even the $175 per day Neupogen shots. Yes, because healthcare is gov’t subsidized I didn’t get those shot preventively right from the beginning like some patients do but I got them fast enough when my blood counts went down. I am ok with that. Let me assure you that cancer medications are not cheap. Neither is chemo. I continue to go for check-ups without paying a dime. I am seeing an excellent surgeon for reconstruction that is entirely covered for me including at home nursing visits after my surgery. I was able to get a preventative bi-lateral mastectomy without argument even though it was only medically indicated that my right breast be removed. I felt supported by the health care system.

I honestly do not take these things for granted. I truly believe that because I didn’t have to worry about whether I could afford treatment my recovery was easier and far less stressful. I am so incredibly thankful and consider myself blessed.

Having gone through this health adventure so recently when I read this at Amanda B’s site I almost wept. This poor man, Chester, isn’t getting his basic needs taken care of like pain relief or proper nourishment or medical care and attention when he needs it most. His situation is absolutely heartbreaking. The fact that it is happening in a rich country like the US freaks me out. Yes, we Canadians have really high taxes but I can say we happily pay them knowing that it relieves us of worry when worry about money is the last thing we need. Being sick is hard and stressful enough.

Please go and donate any amount you can possibly spare to help this man. Because my own experience is still so fresh in my mind I cannot emphasize enough how offering Chester and his mom a little support so that he can relieve his pain, feed his body, rest in a clean, warm and safe bed and see a doctor will help him far beyond physical limits. It will ease his soul which all humans in his situation deserve.

Retinking It All

Well last year I very flippantly blogged about an old relationship I had where I found the love of my life in bed with my friend. I was light hearted and jokey about it but the fact is, at the time, the whole situation devastated me. I lost my live-in boyfriend, my close girlfriend and my home as I was the one who moved out that very same day. I was 22 years old and my idealistic view of love was shattered. Probably not a bad thing in theory but I just wish it could have happened in a gentler and more gradual way.

By no means was the relationship perfect. I had gone through a very severe depression the year before where I cried in bed the vast majority of the time. I was not easy to live with. While he did the best he could I can’t say that I received a lot of support and understanding from him. It didn’t really bring us closer together. But we stuck it out.

There were lots of other problems. We were too young. I was 20 and he was 24 when we met. We moved in together too quickly. It wasn’t one of those decisions based on a shared desire to take the relationship to the next level but due to convenience. My two room-mates and I moved into a large house with him and his two room-mates. It was to save on rent. Soon after we moved into an apartment on our own.

He had some serious personal problems as well that I found very hard to handle. He was terrible with money. For instance the landlord would inform me that the rent cheque had bounced. Well, I knew that I had given the boyfriend my half of the rent so he had blown it somehow. I would be freaking and he would totally minimize the situation. That drove me crazy. I would be fending off collection agencies due to his financial problems and then come home from work to a brand new big screen TV or stereo equipment he had bought and I was “a bummer” for not raving about it. It would drive me nuts.

His family was a bit of a disaster as well. It came to light that his father had sexually abused his sister through her teenage years. The mother knew about it and did nothing. There was a whole lot of denial going on which really bothered me. I didn’t really know how to handle it all. It scared me.

During all this, one day while at I was at work, a girl I knew from high school came in and we struck up a conversation again. I had really idolized her in school as she was very cool and knew good music and dressed really funky. So I learned she had just come out of a dysfunctional teenage marriage and we reconnected and fell into a close friendship were she would join me, my boyfriend and our room-mate (my boyfriend’s childhood friend) for dinner and weekend get-togethers and we all got quite close. One day she offered us an interesting living arrangement. Her family house had been tenanted due to her parent’s recent separation and the fact the kids had all grown up and moved out. The present tenants were moving and we could move in as a group for significantly less than we were all paying then. The house had a huge yard, was within walking distance to my work and it all seemed like a good idea. We always had so much fun together so wouldn’t it be great to have that 24/7? We all thought so.

We moved in, painted everything wild and crazy colours and I started getting a very bad feeling. I can’t really say I suspected anybody of cheating but I think I sensed a shift in loyalties and focus. My friend started budding into disagreements between me and my boyfriend and siding with him so I was really looking like the bad guy. One of our big discussions was about kids. He really wanted them and I didn’t. I felt too young and that I hadn’t got my education yet or done traveling like I wanted to. I was uncomfortable with his financial situation and didn’t think we could afford kids. Maybe in the future at some point but I just couldn't guarantee when I might want them. He wanted them really badly. Maybe not right that second but he wanted a promise and timeline that I couldn’t give. My friend, on the other hand, made no secret of the fact she was PINING for kids and totally sympathized with his plight. I really felt ganged up on.

One day we had had yet another wrenching discussion about kids where I couldn’t tell him when I would definitely want them. That afternoon he went off to work. My friend was working a similar shift and was having car problems so my boyfriend offered to drive her to work and pick her up after. I didn’t think anything of it. I expected them home by about 9:30 but they didn’t come. I waited with our other room-mate (his childhood friend) and worried. He worried too. We just didn’t know what was going on. Finally at about 2 am I asked him to drive me to my parent's place as I was really freaking. Interestingly I didn’t ever think something bad had happened like a car accident or something like that. I just knew they had gone off with each other. So I left my boyfriend a note saying that I didn’t know what was going on and that in light of our discussion that day I was uncertain what his disappearance meant. I wrote that maybe we were not meant to be with each other and that I was at my parent’s place. Apparently they came home sometime after 3 am. I fully expected him to come and get me once he arrived home but he never did. Early that morning I took the bus back to the house and went to our room. He wasn’t there. I knocked on my friend’s bedroom door to see if she was home and when she opened it there he was laying in her bed naked. He didn’t say a word to me. I was so shocked I walked away and my friend closed the door behind her and hid in the bathroom. I tried to get in again to confront him but the door was locked. So I just turned to her and told her that I hoped they both rotted in hell and I walked out. Later that morning I called and told him that I wanted them both out of the house so I could move my stuff out which I did. I never spoke to him again. Or her.

Literally I never spoke to them again.

So this weekend, exactly 15 years to the week that all this went down, I stumbled upon a notice in the paper. My ex-cheating-boyfriend died “suddenly” and “tragically” last month. I don’t know how. His widow is my ex-friend who he cheated on me with. They had no children.

!!!!!!!!

How I found this notice in itself is very spooky. His notice was in the next column right beside an obit of an acquaintance of my family who had died of cancer last week. What are the chances of that?

I don’t really know how to feel about all this. I can’t say that I am very upset about his death. I am more shocked. It was so freaky, after all these years, to see that photo of him. It was mind blowing to know that the two of them were married and had made a life with each other for the last 15 years. It is hard to figure out what all this means. I am sad that it happened but there is also all this confusion because the situation was so bad. I was so crushed and humiliated about his actions. It was a terrible time. I feel somewhat conflicted about it all.

A friend told my story to a friend of hers who is a clairvoyant/spiritualist type person and she said that my ex-boyfriend lead me to find his death notice for me to get closure and for him to say good-bye. I don’t feel like I have closure as this has stirred up all sorts of emotions I thought were long laid to rest.

I hope that I can figure all this out and slot everything back into place so it all makes sense to me again. Wrap my mind around it all. I hope that I can eventually say good-bye to him for good and really mean it.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Guest Crushee

Today I went with my neighbour Michelle and her dog Xiola to the doggy park for an afternoon of fetch. I had a blast. Of course, I couldn't let a crushing oportunity pass me by. I know she isn't a cat but I am an equal opportunity crusher.

Here is our dear Xiola feeling the crush from the fun toy I bought for her. There was some totally tubular frisbee catching today. She rocks.

Ok. So crushing her head gave me much pleasure. Sue me.

She looks good, no?

We Are Family

I welcomed a brand new addition into my home today. I am the proud owner of a new couch. Yes, it is a cheap couch but a new one which is something I’ve never had before. My last couch was bought for $20 in a junk shop and then inexpertly reupholstered by myself. That was 6 years ago and while the old couch was not necessarily in rough shape it wasn’t exactly a thing of beauty. In fact I was feeling slightly guilty about spending the money as I am sure I could have ‘made do’ with the old couch for a year or two longer despite the fact it had started swallowing my ass. But since I have started feeling better the last few months I am experiencing a major nesting compulsion and am craving a whole new look for my apartment. Maybe it is needing to start fresh again after a hard time. Maybe it is because I didn’t do much shopping for the last year and need to make up for that. Maybe Yoshi is whispering decorating tips to me in my sleep. I don’t know but things, they are a’ changing!

Once I had set up The New Structure of Enveloping Goodness I took a moment to have a chat with Yoshi. I snuggled up to her real close and whispered these words into her ear.

“If you claw the new couch I’ll kill you.”

“If you piss on the new couch I’ll kill you.”

“If you puke on the new couch I’ll kill you.”

She has never done any of these vile actions before but I just wanted to make myself clear.

Now I have to admit that a certain someone told me today that I am dangerously close to becoming a crazy cat lady. That all my posts revolve around Yoshi. I have no idea what he is talking about.

My Fur Child ejecting her tenatiously clingy individual hairs onto my new suede-like upholstery.

Despite my dire warnings to the cat about proper couch celebrating etiquette I tempted fate by not only eating a spicy curry dinner while sitting on the couch but also consumed vast quantities of orangey type Cheesy Poufs on it as well. The couch held its own and repelled any splatter and crumbs. Well done Couchy Poo, well done!

I think we are all going to get along just fine. Any family addition who facilitates me laying around is always welcome.

PS-if anybody ever wants to quit drinking I suggest you read this. I don’t drink at all and now NEVER will. EVER!!!!

What Filling For My New Doughnuts

Well I went to see my very cute plastic surgeon today and he said that in about 4 months I will have my implants installed for more permanent boobies. I am looking forward to this part of the journey as the expanders I have now are slightly odd shaped and make for an interesting silhouette. By interesting I mean hard, irregular and slightly lopsided.

“So,” he said. “What kind of implants do you want?” “Well, what kind have you got?” I replied. It appears I have a choice and I would really love your input while making this decision. I am hoping that maybe somebody out there has implants or knows somebody with them and can tell me all about their experiences and the pros and cons.

Here are my choices:

SALINE IMPLANTS

Pros
-very safe

Cons
-do not feel natural-very squishy
-may cause “wrinkling”

SILICONE IMPLANTS

Pros
-feel and look more natural

Cons
-nasty history of possible health issues with leaking problems

He tells me that silicone implants are made differently now with a thicker plastic shell as well as much more jelly-like silicone that doesn’t leak out like it used to. He also says that experts have not really been able to find a definitive link between silicone leakage and health problems. Apparently while they were banned for a few years in North America the rest of the world continued to use them with few problems. Of course The Internet is bubbling over with horrific tales of silicone poisoning. Who to trust?

To be honest I wasn’t even sure that silicone breast implants were used in Canada at this time but it appears they are. I just assumed I would use saline. Info I have gathered states that it is a very high likelihood that my implants will rupture in my lifetime. I am leaning towards happy saline boobies but…

In any case I can take my time choosing as well as go in for another appointment to ask more questions. I am usually prepared with a piece of paper filled with queries but I expected to have my expanders filled a little more today and nothing else. It turns out my chest is about as expanded as it is going to get and no injections were needed and the all important decision came up. So I was not prepared to ask important and well informed questions. In fact I sorta sat there like a lump. Mute.

So if you have any info you can share with me I would greatly appreciate it. If you don’t want to put personal stuff in comments you can email me at crankypantsATshawDOTca and I will keep everything sent to me confidential and not blog about it at all. I promise. Even if it is very funny. And if you are interested on reading more about implants in general you can go to the FDA website and type in ‘breast implants.’ That’s what I have been doing tonight. Looking at booby photos. Too bad I don’t have Feel-o-vision.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Yoshicita

Hot AND spicy.

Watching My Independence Trickle Away

After going though cancer treatment all last year a lot of things got put on the back burner. There are so many jobs I want to catch up on like painting my whole apartment INCLUDING the ceilings which is not going to happen any time soon because my right arm is still sore and weak from my surgery. I also have to get rid of my poor decrepit couch to make room for a new one but I don’t know how I am going to get that behemoth down 2 flights of stairs. My car desperately needs to be polished and detailed as it hasn’t been washed in over a year. Basically, I need a boyfriend.

I am a long time standing single gal and for the most part am quite content to be free of the drama and problems that arise within relationships. I have the whole bed to myself and I have 100% control over the TV remote. No pesky whisker hairs in my sink and I never have to worry about a dutch oven when I least expect it. I am able to do most everything that needs to be done on my own and without help but things are a bit different now since my surgeries. It seems I turned into a bit of a useless girl.

DAMMIT!!! Sometimes having a nice strong guy around is mighty handy. Now don’t get all women’s' lib-ish on me. I don’t expect him to do it all while I go out for lunch with the ladies. Only it would be nice to have a bit of help with the heavy stuff or the high bits. A nice guy to offer to take the inevitable face splatter from painting overhead and cart the ladder up and down the stairs. Maybe even give me a back rub after I do all the detail work on my car dash with Q-Tips while he does the scrubbing on the outside. I’d give him one too. If I didn’t fall asleep during mine. I am generous that way.

No guys are jumping out of the woodwork to help so for now I have to live with the chipped paint and the moss on my car. My old couch will linger in the hallway for other tenants to climb over to get to their apartments. My back will remain unrubbed.

But I am working on it.

Part 2-Another Long One But Hang In There

So in late 2004 I went to Hawaii for 10 days. I had never left Yoshi for that long. Only for the occasional all-nighter when I had to work. My parents cared for Yoshi while I was gone and she behaved pretty much how I expected her to. She freaked out and yowled for about 3 days and then settled down and was fine for the rest of the time. Kinda like a kid which is seriously what this cat is to me. Keep that in mind as I go on here.

The next day she threw up. Not a big deal as she does that every once in a while. What was different was that there was a little spot of blood in the vomit. About the size of a ladybug. I had never seen that before but knew that cats will vomit blood when highly stressed. But I started to worry. What if she ate something she wasn’t supposed to at my parent’s place? What if she had been acting sick and I hadn’t been there to see her symptoms and my parents didn’t notice the subtle differences? And then I thought I might be overreacting. She was acting just fine. She didn’t appear sick in any way. And then I started wondering if it might be stress from the fact that I had put my empty suitcase right by the door to go back into basement storage which was the exact same place I put my full suitcase several days earlier just before I abandoned her for a long period of time. Hmmmmm. She is a VERY smart cat.

Finally I thought that I would feel better if I took her to the vet for a quick check up and as I had health insurance it wouldn’t be a big financial deal. That is what it is for, right? Of course it was a weekend so I once again bundled her up and took her to the exorbitant 24 hour emergency vet.

I got a different vet from her last visit a couple years before and I explained the whole situation to her. I told her I wasn’t even sure that it was an emergency and that everything seemed fine but I just wanted to rule out major issues. She suggested a series of x-rays to see if she ate anything as well a blood panel to see if she was sick. I totally agreed as I thought this would rule out what I was worried about. So they did those things and everything came out fine. Normal results on everything.

I thought they would just let me take her home but the vet said she wanted to keep her overnight. I remembered how much that cost and how much Yoshi had hated it and didn’t really feel it was necessary and told the vet that. She got really mad and started saying things like “If Yoshi survives the night etc…” And I am like, “Wait a minute! Her tests came out normal, she is acting fine and you are saying she might not survive the night? What is going on?” She said that she thought it might be a good idea to hook her up to IV fluids to offset any dehydration. I said that she had only barfed once and didn’t seem dehydrated at all. I assured them I lived close by and would bring her back if I saw anything wrong with her or if she continued to vomit. Yet the vet INSISTED she stay saying that she just didn’t know what might happen and I thought to myself, “Well, it is all covered so why not.” And I left Yoshi there.

Yoshi was not happy to be left and made her displeasure known so I told them that she could be a bit “difficult” and that she behaved very well for me so if they had ANY problem with her at all just to call me and I could be there in less than 5 minutes and hold her and make her behave. They agreed. I also said that they should call me if there was any medical change or if they wanted to do anything more than give her IV fluids. I said I was not crazy about putting her under anesthesia as she has had issues with it in the past when she was fixed (Siamese are like that sometimes) and asked them to let me know ahead of time so I could make any decisions around that issue. These are things I expressly talked about.

I went home and really regretted going to the vet. Not because of the cost but because I knew Yoshi was terrified and I wasn’t exactly convinced that she really needed to be there. I sorta felt bullied a little into letting her stay there. A thought about it for a couple of hours and decided to drop by the vet again to visit her and check on her status. I called and they said it was fine for me to come in.

I walked in and there was Yoshi in her cage. She was hooked up to an IV and had one of those funnel collars on. She could hardly keep her poor eyes open and her third eyelid was all droopy. Her eyes had watered all over her face and her fur looked terrible. When I left her she looked fine and now she looked like shit. She let off this sad little meow. I asked what was wrong with her and they said she had resisted them when they put in the IV so they had sedated her with anesthesia to calm her down. I immediately started to cry and ran over to her cage and took her out and cuddled her. Then I got PISSED. I told them I had expressly asked them to call me if this happened and that they had done exactly what I asked them not to do. They totally blew me off saying it was no big deal and she was just fine. Maybe she was but she didn’t look fine and they had gone against my simple instructions. If they had called I am sure I could have calmed her down. If not I would have ok’d some sedation. I never got that chance. I asked if I could take her home and they said I shouldn’t as it wasn’t a good idea since she had been under anesthetic. FUCK!!!! Now I couldn’t take her out of there even though I wanted to. She was stuck and so was I. Of course there were extra charges for anesthetic and use of the funnel collar and even a charge for extra time as she had mangled her first IV when they were putting it in. This visit added up to $1400.

I made arrangements with them to come at a certain time the following day to assist them in removing the IV. I held her and they took it out and Yoshi made the most horrible freaky howling noise and they were a little freaked too. But no anesthetic was needed which made me happy. I paid my bill, took her home and she immediately ran to her dish to eat. She was totally fine. And I felt like a prize asshole for putting her through it all. I had asked one of the vet assistants if she thought Yoshi was in any serious health crisis and she said absolutely not and that it was most likely stress. Exactly what I suspected it was. She hadn’t vomited once her whole time at the vet.

Looking back I really felt like I had been emotionally manipulated into keeping her overnight with that, “Not making it through the night” comment. I didn’t feel good about any of the treatment she had except for the initial tests. I just felt it was a really negative experience. While the visit was covered by health insurance I am responsible for a deducible and that wasn’t a minor amount. I just didn’t think that many of the things they had done to her were necessary and the whole situation had escalated out of control. I also felt relief that Yoshi was home and ok. I vowed never to go on holiday again. Her vet bill added up to more than my whole vacation cost in the first place. Pretty ironic.

Then 10 days after her vet visit Yoshi came down with a lovely case of fleas. And I thought, “For FUCK’S sake! And they give her fleas on top of it all. Talk about adding insult to injury!” I called and complained and they once again totally blew me off saying that they had no control over the flea status of their patients. I said that in light of what had happened at Yoshi’s visit it would go a long way for customer relations if they would comp a $10 dose of flea killer. The receptionist asked her boss and told me that they wouldn’t do that but I was welcome to come to the office and buy a package of 6 doses for $65. I declined and went to the SPCA and bought it there for $45. I still have 5 doses left. Being an indoor cat she never has had fleas since.

I am so glad there are talented and caring vets out there. If I wasn’t so squeamish I would have been a vet myself. I know with absolute certainty that most vets are ethical and honest people. I know it is always better to err on the side of caution and completely agree more tests that can be done on a sick or injured animal allows for a better diagnosis. However I also think that pet owners have to be savvy consumers and ask for clarification and information about what they are going to be paying for. Unlike many other businesses you still get charged for services rendered even if they don’t work or the outcome is not what you were expecting. Veterinary medicine is a calling but I also think it is a business. I have heard of many stories where owners have been offered care for reduced prices or for no cost whatsoever. Personally I have never experienced that but I know it happens. Vets have to freedom to adjust their services if they so wish. They also have every right to charge whatever prices they want as well. I don’t think anybody should feel bad for shopping around for better prices or for a vet they feel more emotionally comfortable with. Even with insurance finances are considerations and is part of the whole equation no matter how much we all wish they were not. If I ever had an emergency situation with Yoshi I would definitely take her back to that 24 hour clinic because they are very good and qualified vets but I would totally stand up for myself now if something didn’t sound right to me. I know Yoshi better than they do and I have to trust that.

I think owning a pet is a privilege and one I don’t take lightly. While I do bitch and moan when I spend large amounts of money on Yoshi I grumble about spending large amounts of money on myself or anybody else. I don’t have a lot so when it is gone it is sorely missed. However I never begrudge that money because that is part of the bargain I made when I took responsibility for her. I would love several other animals in my house but I don’t have them because I know I don’t have the funds to take care of them as well as I think they deserve.

So when I took Yoshi to the vet for her bad breath and got pitched for a rabies vaccination I decided to trust my gut and decline. I don’t have a fireplace and chances are no bats will ever get the opportunity to attack Yoshi. If it did happen I would absolutely have her treated. In a heartbeat. What bothered me was that this vet knew she was allergic to shots and suggested it anyway. It sounded to me like I was being up-sold. Like when you buy shoes and they encourage you to get protector spray for them or point out that rack of earrings that are on sale. Maybe up-selling is part of the business practices of some vets in my city (and they have the right to do that as I have the right to decline) or maybe it was just that this vet thought the risks of a bat attack outweighed the risks of a vaccine reaction and possible cancer at the site later on. I decided not. And I am The Momma.

Further Thought

Just last week I wrote a post about veterinary care and a recent experience I had with it. I got a few very interesting comments both agreeing with me and disagreeing as well. All were muchly appreciated. My post even spawned other posts on the same topic offering opinions and observations. Too cool.

I probably should have explained my opinions a bit more and how I have arrived at them. I have a point of view that may not be shared by others as well as some unique circumstances that would affect my thoughts on this subject.

Obviously finances come into play whenever a pet owner has to get veterinary care for their pet. Some people are fortunate that they can adopt a very aggressive treatment plan for their animal and be able to afford it. Some people use credit to handle their vet bills while some have to evaluate very carefully what they can and cannot afford to do. Whatever your finances are when your pet is hurt or sick that time is very emotional and scary. In that kind of heightened situation sometimes you do not make good decisions or ask good questions or even understand what is going on. You may have feelings of guilt and anger about how your pet ended up in the vet. It is just not a good time.

I have to admit I am in a very enviable situation as I have health insurance for Yoshi. This is not unlimited insurance and in this day and age my maximum paid amounts can be reached very quickly but this policy allows me certain freedoms a lot of other pet owners don’t have. I know that I work contract jobs and am chronically under employed so I never wanted to be in a position where I couldn’t afford to get Yoshi treated. This insurance has saved my and Yoshi’s ass a couple of times.

When I evaluate Yoshi’s vet care I have to balance what will be of the most benefit to her balanced by how stressed and upset I know she will be getting these treatments. Yoshi is a very emotional cat. She hates everybody except for me and my parents. And she only kinda tolerates my parents. Time and familiarity does not change her mind. She is a Siamese and therefore a bit of a freaktard. When she is in familiar territory this hatred manifests itself in hissing and yowling and bad behavior. When she is away from home and in unfamiliar territory she is absolutely frantic with terror. It breaks my heart. So while money doesn’t play largely into her receiving veterinary care her emotional wellbeing definitely does.

The first time I used Yoshi’s health insurance it was because she ate one of my antidepressant pills. I was taking one out of its container and dropped it. I swear before it even hit the floor Yoshi had run to snap it up out of the air. I was shocked as she never really was one to be nosey about stuff like that. It was Saturday night about 11pm so I bundled her up and drove the 3 minutes to the emergency 24 hour vet. This place is staffed 24/7 and their prices reflect their extraordinary availability. You know when you take your pet there you will be paying. A LOT! It is an emergency situation so you suck it up. This clinic is staffed with really good vets and I totally trust them. They do one thing that pisses me off though. They charge a $50 walk in fee. You have to pay this for walking in before they even take your information and have your pet seen. This is an extra fee on top of the exorbitant regular fees you can expect to pay. I think this is just adding insult to injury and a bit of a cash grab but what can you do? You are in an emergency situation and at a disadvantage to be picky. But I still think it sucks.

So they took Yoshi and gave her charcoal and an emetic to make her barf. I waited there for a couple hours but she just wouldn’t hurl. They thought she might be too stressed and intimidated to do it in the vet so they let me take her home to see if she would relax and urp up the pill there. I happily shelled out about $600 for that visit and took her home.

And then she puked. AND puked. And wouldn’t stop. No eating and no drinking just hurling. All night and all day. I called the emergency vet and told them what was happening and they said that they did give her a lot of emetic and that her poor stomach was probably messed up and that I should bring her in for IV fluids. So another walk in fee later, as it was Sunday and I still couldn’t take her to a regular vet, they hooked her up to IV fluids and kept her overnight. Do you know what they charged me for her overnight stay? I am not talking her treatments like IVs and such but just the act of keeping her overnight. 900 bucks. That is the charge. Holy SHIT!!!! But I was happy with her care. They were honest with me that they thought she would pull through but that nobody could know how much of the medication she absorbed. They offered me hope in a very scary situation. I paid about $1600 for that trip and was reimbursed by insurance. That entire episode resulted in 2 trips to the ER vet along with 4 days of all day vet care at her regular vet.

While at the regular vet I was “encouraged’ to keep her overnight there for about $125 per night. I would have been happy to do that if I had felt it offered Yoshi good benefits but I didn’t believe that at all. First of all the vet was completely unstaffed from closing at 9 pm to opening the next morning at 8am. Yoshi would be all alone in a small cage overnight in a strange place for 11 hours. She would not be receiving any treatments during this time. Just sleeping. I decided I wanted to have her at home with me where she would be more comfortable and where I could watch her. I knew I lived 3 minutes away from the emergency vet if anything happened and I was willing and able to return her to the regular vet office first thing in the morning to hook her back up to IV fluids. I cannot tell you how I had to fight to do this. It seemed totally logical to me and yet they were very disapproving. I am SOOOOO glad I did keep her home as she was so weak and full of fluids that she almost immediately peed her bed. Poor booby couldn’t walk to the litter box. If at the vet she would have laid in her own cold wet piss ALL NIGHT LONG. That is not ok with me. Clearly she got better care with me overnight than alone at the vet. Yet I really got a guilt trip for taking her home where I stayed up all night and cuddled her making sure she was safe and comfortable. This REALLY pissed me off.

A friend of mine just recently went through a similar thing. He is a professional breeder and is very emotionally attached to his dogs. Clearly it is not just a "business" to him. One dog had just had a litter of puppies while another dog had mysteriously lost her puppies just prior to birth. It was a very emotional time for my friend. He was so happy but so devastated at the same time. One of the puppies, coincidentally the one he was planning on keeping, got very sick one day with a fever. He rushed the puppy to the vet and they were very discouraging about the puppy’s chances. They thought the puppy would die. They gave her antibiotics and IV fluids and were just hoping for the best. That night I talked with my friend who said he was thinking of bringing the puppy home for the night. He thought that if he had to choose between having the puppy die alone overnight in the unstaffed vet or at home with him and the momma dog and her puppy siblings where he could watch her he would rather have her at home. He even was willing to stay up all night so she could keep the IV in that they were just going to take out at the vet’s office. However they totally insisted the puppy stay overnight at the vet and employed some very heavy handed guilt tactics to keep her there. He finally relented and was very upset and didn’t feel like his wishes had been heard. Fortunately the puppy survived and he got to take her home the next day. If that dog had died alone overnight I know he never would have forgiven himself. I just think this is wrong. He had no complaints about the cost of the care but that his opinions were not considered.

I am going to break this up into two parts and tell you tomorrow about another experience I had with a vet that might further illustrate how I have arrived at some of my opinions. This post was to show you how when I made a decision for my cat that I felt was best for her and me I was discouraged and contradicted even though the vet could not show me that Yoshi would be any better off in their care. In fact I could clearly see that she would be better supervised and monitored in my care overnight than alone and afraid in an empty vet office. I do truly believe that these vets had Yoshi’s best interest in mind and I think she got excellent treatment while in their care but the only reason why I could see the regular vet would want me to keep her overnight at their facility is for monetary gain. A vet clinic is a business and I am not so naive to think that they would not try to suggest expensive options if they could. Keeping an animal overnight could be a better option for some who might not have access to transportation or be home to look after their cat or dog but I was both mobile and available to be there for Yoshi and even though it basically caused an argument I was glad I stood firm and did that for her. I don’t think I should have been argued with or guilt tripped. It should have been my decision. And it was a decision that had no basis in money but it could have been and that would have been valid too.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-She Is My Sunshine

She makes me happy when skies are grey.

I Can Smell My Visa Burning

I took Yoshi back to the vet for a follow up appointment after her course of antibiotics for her heinous breath. While she was on the drugs her breath was absolutely odorless yet I can detect a faint stink creeping back since she’s been off. Not nearly as bad as it was but no longer like angel farts. The vet thinks she has chronically inflamed gums and might need to be periodically put on antibiotics. The tartar on her teeth is so minimal for a cat her age that they do not think a cleaning would help at all. Ok. I can deal with that.

I have found through my various visits for Yoshi’s dramatics that many vets I have encountered are a very negative bunch. They “Tsk Tsk” a lot and suggest all sorts of expensive tests that don’t always have an appreciable benefit. I don’t know if they are covering their asses liability-wise or if it is common business practice to try to inflate a bill but it is not uncommon for me to wonder why they are being so pessimistic. **TWISTED UTERUS-Maybe you can tell me what you know about this. Is it taught in school?”** I understand that our precious boogies cannot tell us what is wrong but is there really a need to make me freak out that if I don’t get Yoshi’s aura cleansed she might die? Ok-I am kidding here but I am sure you know what I mean. Now I will say that not all vets are like this and I have encountered lovely vets who offer a ‘conservative-wait-and-see’ course of treatment along with a ‘no-expense-is-too-much’ approach and explain the benefits and risks of everything. I appreciate that as I think there is nothing quite as terrible as watching your beloved pet suffer through a treatment that does not offer significant gains AND then face financial ruin at the end of it all because you didn’t know any better.

Let me tell you what happened to me at the SPCA vet office the other day when I questioned the vet about a couple tests she suggested for Yoshi.

They did a blood test on Yoshi and a couple levels were slightly elevated. And when I mean slightly I mean only one point above normal range. The vet said that these elevations could indicate early disease or a stressed cat. Well, after Yoshi attached her body to my neck and left nail furrows in the back of my leather jacket I decided to go with the “stressed” diagnosis. However, I was willing to listen to her logic and go from there. She wanted to do a Feline Leukemia test as well as a Cat HIV test. I didn’t think it was necessary as Yoshi is an exclusively indoor cat with absolutely no exposure to any other fur beast that could transmit such things. But she said in light of possible chronic/long term infection in her mouth and the fact that kittens can get infected from their mother it might be a good idea. I agreed and they did the test and I did not begrudge the cost at all as I could see her point. Yoshi is negative for both. I credit the condoms I give her.

The other thing she wanted to do was a urine test for kidney function. The whole rigmarole to get a clean pee sample leaves a lot to be desired (you know how cats are) so I got the supplies and if I can get the pee I will take it in. If not then no biggie. I am not going to fret about it too much. Stress is Yoshi’s middle name; not mine.

As I was getting Yoshi all tucked away into her carrier the vet flung one last idea out there for me to consider. “How about a rabies vaccination?” Yoshi is terribly allergic to vaccines and it is on her chart that she should never get them. She is at an increased risk of cancer at the needle site and as a single indoor cat at very low risk for contagious diseases. Also she had been fully vaccinated (including rabies) three times in kittenhood. I think those immunities still stand and recent research agrees with me. So why she would suggest a vaccine was puzzling. Especially rabies for an inside cat. I asked her why. This is the answer I got.

“Well, what if a bat flies into your house and bites the cat.”

Honestly, I looked around expecting to see a camera crew and a jokey video show host jump out at me with a big cheque. No such luck. She was shit serious. Yeah, and I guess monkeys could fly out of my butt and bite her too. I have never seen a bat in my area nor have I EVER heard of a bat flying into anybody’s house. I have screens in my windows too. God.

I said that I thought I would take my chances and deal with a bat bite as it happens. She nodded and said that was certainly an option as well. Of course with a foreboding tone of voice implying that I am a really shortsighted and neglectful owner.

Ok. I can live with that. In fact I’ll go one step farther. If Yoshi gets rabies from being bitten by a bat that has flown in through my apartment window (or out of my ass) I will jump out at the vet with a big cheque and a camera crew.

Sad Days

I have spent a few days thinking and wondering and wrestling with conflicting thoughts and ideas. I am asking questions with no real answers. I am exploring doubts with no clear resolutions.

On Thursday a terrible thing happened. Nikki, a friend and fellow blogger, lost her life in a car accident. She, a talented doctor, was in Cambodia to help others. This is yet another devastating event for her family as her partner, Sarah, lost her life to cancer last summer.

Nikki and the SWLF Sisters were exceptionally supportive of me during my cancer treatment and have also been incredible cheerleaders to others facing this disease. It is all through their own grief and sadness that they maintained such a positive presence in my life and the lives of others. I am so thankful and grateful for each and every one of them.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer last year I can’t tell you how many hours I spent wondering how this could have happened to me. I was not brought up in a particular faith so over my life I have had to find my way through established doctrine and alternative faiths in order to create a belief system that makes sense to me. I have wondered if The Universe has a plan for us all and how could my plan include cancer at such a young age? How did that happen? I thought about dying young without fulfilling all my dreams and was very sad and scared. I wondered if I had deserved this fate due to a negative previous life. I know I haven’t been a bad person this time around but maybe I was supposed to be better and that is why I got cancer. Do people deserve the bad things that happen to them? How did that apply to my situation?

I wanted to believe that there was some sort of Divine Justice. I hoped that everything Happened For a Reason. I thought about Destiny versus Freewill. I talked with a minister who is a breast cancer survivor herself and got her thoughts about these questions and this is what she told me.

“Life is not fair and there is no justice. Bad things happen to good people all the time and good things happen to bad people as well. The vast majority of people do not in any way deserve the terrible things that happen to them. This TOTALLY sucks.”

I am paraphrasing most of that but the “sucks” part is verbatim.

So I decided that there is the possibility of experiencing a little bit of everything in The Universe but absolutely no guarantees it will work out how you think it should. Maybe you will get to see Divine Justice occur on Earth in some situations but maybe that judgment happens in another realm out of our view. Or not at all. Maybe some things happen for a reason and maybe some things happen for no reason. Maybe you don’t see the reason right away or you don’t like the reason and block it out. I think EVEREYBODY is destined to have something terrible happen in their life. Some things are worse than others and some people get more than what seems fair but nobody is immune. The freewill part is how you deal with your tragedies. You do have a great deal of control over how you do that.

I admired Nikki so much as she chose the deal with her sorrow by helping those who needed it most. She and The Sisters spread love and support as a way to celebrate Sarah’s life. I saw and learned about grace and generosity from these women and their families. I saw them endeavor to accept what they couldn’t change and do amazing things with what they could.

As time has gone by I have come to realise that if not for my cancer I never would have met Nikki and The Sisters as well as all of you. While I would never think of my cancer as a good thing, good things have come to me as a result of it. It would be foolish for me not to accept and celebrate these aspects of my own difficulties. Maybe they are good reasons for my cancer. Maybe I will see more reasons as time goes on. Maybe not.

I have been eating chocolate in Nikki and Sarah’s honour. I have been thinking about them being together again and this helps a little. Mostly I have once again been made aware of how tenuous life is. How what time we have with the people that we love is such a gift.

I wish so desperately that this accident would have never happened. There is so much I wish I had control over that I don’t. I will shake my head and resist the brutal unfairness of it all. I will question and argue and try to make the puzzle pieces fit in a way that seems logical in My Universe. I will be angry and sad and bitter. For a while. Deep down I know that I have to eventually acknowledge the futility of this and concentrate my energy on things I can change and control. Remain open and receptive to any lessons. Exercise my freewill in a meaningful and powerful way.

I have no way of knowing if this makes sense to anybody reading thus far but I want to close with this; I feel very lucky and blessed to have known Nikki and I will miss her.

When Bad Thinking Happens to Good People

Tonight I watched one of my favourite shows, America’s Next Top Model. When I watch this show I always start thinking about beauty and how confusing it is to me. You can’t help but see how society holds external beauty in such high esteem. These female contestants all look beautiful in their own way but as the show goes on and you get to know them a little bit better you really start to see that some of them don’t think themselves beautiful at all. Or that some of them have such ugly personalities that you no longer see their outside beauty either. Yet in that instant that a photo is taken they are able to convince you that they possess every good quality a person can. They inspire you to buy a product and fuel dreams and wishes to become and own what they are and have. They incite desire and envy. They hold power over us.

Right after this show I changed channels to watch a show called The FaceMakers. This is all about a team of plastic surgeons who specialize in facial and cranial reconstruction. I watched stories about a six month little girl who was born without a lower jaw as well as a four year old girl who has such a rare condition there is only twenty cases in the world. Her skull was so deformed her brain was bulging out of her forehead. And my heart broke a little.

All the competitions on ANTM seem so silly and shallow compared to the challenges facing these kids. A good twirl just isn’t as big a deal as being able to eat and breathe properly no matter what Tyra says. With these contrasting situations it was even more glaringly obvious how these models perpetuate an unrealistic vision of what beauty is. I have read that the human race’s view of beauty is the result of an ancient biological urge to produce healthy offspring. You seek a “good looking” partner as those qualities seem to signify good health and wellbeing. Yet how does that make sense in recent times when you can go out and buy beauty? Those surgeries don’t change your genes. We have managed to fool nature. And ourselves.

I don’t have anything clever to say and am unable to end this post so that this whole topic is wrapped up like a pretty gift. I cannot reconcile it all. It confuses me. I think and rant and wonder about it. I get angry at myself that I buy into it and then feel anger at others who buy into it as well. I have my own issues with how I look and how I am perceived by the opposite sex. I am still fooled by beauty into thinking a certain way about a person or a product even with the knowledge that it is all meaningless. I know that a person can be super gorgeous but if they are mean and nasty they will eventually appear ugly. So, yes, beauty is more than superficial features. So why is there so much emphasis on it? How can these two opposite concepts exist in my mind?

Damn you, Tyra!! Damn you and your forehead. I sat down to watch frivolous TV and ended up in mental anguish over an established societal paradigm. Crap.

Being Parents

Well, I drove my folks to the airport to go on their annual trip to Honolulu, Hawaii. I am a little bit envious as a nice warm beach sounds really sweet right now but I am really happy they are going. They stay at a beachside apartment that belongs to family friends. I stayed there for a week just before my cancer diagnosis so I know exactly how great it is. Picture an ocean view and being kept awake at night by crashing waves. It is THAT kind of great. They didn’t get to go last year as they stuck around to help me through surgery and chemo. I felt like such a ratbag about that. I hope they have a fabulous time.

Well, I am managing to get Yoshi to take her antibiotics without too much drama. And they are totally working! I actually sought out her yawns for a sniff test and they totally passed. Her breath smells like angel farts.

She is not absolutely free from future vet intervention, however. The SPCA called this morning and a couple levels on her blood test came in a little low. They want to check her kidney function with a urine test and they need a sample. I asked how the flipping hell I am supposed to catch cat pee. I had visions of trying to slip a plastic container under her butt when she was taking a slash. It wasn’t a pretty visual. Basically I have two choices. I can leave her overnight so they can put a needle into her bladder and get pee pee that way. Um…NO!!!! Or I can get plastic, non-absorbent litter and then clean and sterilize her cat box and then collect a sample and run it to the SPCA ASAP. Guess what I will be doing this week?

I doubt there is anything wrong with the little shit as she is happy and full of beans. Her coat shines and her appetite is good. She is the picture of health and is full of purrs. But the vet just wants to do this simple pee test to make sure there is nothing wrong and after neglecting this bad breath issue for so long (BAD MOM!!!) I feel like I should go a little farther with the testing just to make double sure she is TOTALLY healthy and fit. I just hope this whole bad breath thing wasn’t some painful or uncomfortable condition as I would feel terrible that she might have suffered because I didn’t fix it right away. I don’t think so but you just never know. Is this the kind of doubt and guilt moms feel with their kids? Torture!

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Crusher

Yoshi got weighed at the vet yesterday. She has gained a whole pound over the last couple years. Now she is the crusher. I'd better watch my step.

Meanest Mom EVER!

So I took Yoshi to the vet today because her breath is so bad it burns my nose and makes me cry. I really thought they would just blow me off with the suggestion I get her teeth cleaned but that was not the case at all. The vet ordered a blood panel and a course of antibiotics in case there is some sort of mouth infection that she couldn’t see. Apparently her teeth are in great shape for a cat her age so there was nothing obvious wrong. Good news but if the medication does not fix the problem then they suggest putting her under and doing a dental check. I have kitty health insurance but it doesn’t cover anything dental unless they actually find something wrong. So here I am kinda hoping they find something wrong which is sick and mean. And cheap. I am not to keen on putting my little Yoshi under general anesthetic for anything that is not absolutely necessary. We will have to see.

Yoshi is such a sassy little shit at home but when in the car turns into a spaz. The noises that come from her body are somewhat alarming and pitiful. They are also quite funny. Siamese are particularly vocal and are able to pull off some quite surprising yodeling effects. I laughed my ass off the whole drive. She only yells on the way over and knows that the second ride means we’re homeward bound and is nice and quiet for that part. Smart AND freaky.

I use the SPCA vet for routine visits as they are the cheapest way to go. I have read tales of veterinary woe on many blogs and have discovered that my city is heinously expensive for animal health care. My little visit today was $200. I can kiss my new leather jacket goodbye. L But that stinky fucker is worth it. And not being jolted from sound sleep into full nausea when she yawns in my face will be nice too.

Smell was the theme of the day as when I was in the treatment room a dog patient crapped all over the waiting area. They cleaned it all up by the time I had to wait there while they shaved my pussy (Yoshi, you sickos!) to draw blood. I am exceptionally squeamish at the best of times and the lovely olfactory combination of dog doo and disinfectant was more then I could bear. To cope I had to stand in the doorway and mouth breathe my way past my gag reflex. I am a delicate flower.

I felt so bad about taking the cat to the vet as I could totally relate with everything she was going through. Poor thing was so terrified she tried to shred my jacket and climb into my armpit. I think I might have done that to my mom at a couple of my cancer clinic appointments. Anyway, everybody at the vet office loved her because she is so cute. The lady that took her blood kissed her head. Yoshi was so good to me when I was sick with chemo so today I gave her lots of kisses and love and cuddles when we got home to try to make it up to her.

Now I have to go and give her more of her antibiotics. Let the hating begin.

The chilliest of cold shoulders...

Those Magic Words

Absolutely fantastic news, everybody! Debutaunt is officially cancer free! She kicked cancer's ass! Go on over and say Woo!

Pittance

Today’s Mrtl’s Motif Monday theme is One Million Dollars and What You Would Do If You Had It. This is a topic I can write about as I often attempt positive visualization exercises in my goal of winning the lottery. I have thought long and hard about this subject and the sad conclusion is that One Million Dollars is simply not enough to do everything I want to. Not even close. Not in Vancouver.

Here is how I would spend $1,000,000. (I am going to consider this in cool US cash so that would work out to be $1,174,090 CAN)

1. Buy myself a basic two bedroom apartment at aprox 900 sq feet-$450,000
2. Buy my parents a basic two bedroom apartment at aprox 900 sq feet-$450,000
3. Gift my brother and his wife something towards their staggering mortgage-$100,000
4. Pay off the last drabs of my stupid student loans for my education that qualified me for no jobs except working in the film industry or folding sweaters at the GAP-$11,000
5. Corrective eye surgery-$3,500
6. Fabulous Karmen Ghia convertible-$15,000 (conversely I could get my 92 Jetta detailed and polished for about $400 but that is not nearly as much fun)
7. Spanky new camera-probably Nikon. And yes, that would be including a shwack of groovy lenses-$7,500+
8. Christian Louboutin boots-Oooh la la! $1,000+
9. Opening my own business-$100,000 (details to come)
10. Paying for my cousins’ university educations-$30,000 x2
11. Exciting travel opportunities like this, and this and this and this. And especially this. $$$$
12. Something small and understated for Yoshi.
13. Private fitness trainer
14. Personal chef
15. Spa trips
16. Laser hair removal
17. Shopping sprees
18. I could go on and on but I know I am over budget already. DAMMIT!!!!!

See what I mean?