Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Clusterfucked

Flippin’ hell.

You are not going to believe this.

I got a call from my plastic surgeon’s office about my surgery tomorrow. Apparently there is a little problem. I may not have my surgery tomorrow after all. I won’t know until the very last minute so I have to go to the hospital, get admitted, wait a couple hours and only after my doctor feels up my chest will we know if the surgery will go ahead or not.

Guess what happened. One of my implants was damaged in shipping. It was poked. My surgeon ordered 2 sizes of these super duper hella expensive state of the art fake hoots and one of the larger size was damaged. They thought they found a replacement through another clinic but it turned out to be the wrong kind so they just found out today that we are one tit sack short of a full stack. It might work out that the smaller pair will work fine and in that case things will go forward as planned. If I need the porn star size then I am outta luck. They have to order a new one from Ireland. Who knew you bought boobs from there? I wonder if they are green…

What next?

20 comments:

sharkey said...

Oh no! The surgery thing is stressful enough without adding this to it. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.

So do you think you'll be craving Lucky Charms after they're installed?

LadyBug said...

Kranki, I've got enough hoots for you and me both (and 1 or 2 others, too). How's about a transfer?

Twisteduterus said...

well damn.

happy and blue 2 said...

Hope the smaller ones are ok..

Susie said...

I was just thinking today, "I wonder if kranki is just about ready for her new breasts." And then I see that you are. But are they ready for you? I hope everything works out just right. So you'll have wild Irish tits. Nice. I guess if we don't hear from you, we'll know you're going for it.
Love and prayers surround you.

east village idiot said...

That is intense news. Smaller is better. Maybe it was fate stepping in to protect you from a defective boobie.

I'll be sending out healing vibes to you tomorrow. Hope all goes well.

Candace said...

Boobs from Ireland? Huh.

I hope you get 'em today, Krankster. I know how sucky it is to be planning something that falls through.

Traci said...

Well now I'm going to be laughing to myself all damn day thinking about your green boobies and wondering if you'll have an irish accent now! ROFL!

katietoyboy said...

Someone had to cop a feel of your famous boobies before you took possession!!
Today is breast cancer awareness day in Ireland and I was thinking of you while buying my cute pink ribbon and key ring this morning.
Gives new meaning to the phrase 'I've got a little bit of irish in me'
Very best of luck with the operation and hope you will be back pole dancing very soon!!

hemlock said...

Oh shit Kranki! How frustrating.

Hopefully your porn star hoots have arrived safe and sound and promptly!

I love Traci's comment. I'm totally going to read this in an Irish accent now.

Susie said...

Because I am too stooopid to figure out what time it is there, vs. what time it is here . . . I'm thinking that you're at the hospital. Or maybe it's too damned early there for you to let us know that you're NOT at the hospital. (Stooopid, I tell ya.) Either way, whether it's happening today or after the next Irishboobdrop, I pray for successful surgery, magnificent outcome and minimal pain. Much love to you, today and every day. (Prayer shawls do work long distance, too, you know. Especially when wrapped around a grateful friend.)

Anonymous said...

What next indeed. I hope the ones that you do get go in TODAY and that they are the right size for your smokin' self.

Love,
Mrs. B

Dima said...

Hope it works out! And who knew that Ireland's economy depends so much on the boob industry! Very interesting! Seriously though, you'd think they're ship them very careful in a way that they wouldn't ever pop. I say go for the smaller ones. Big ones are no fun!

Closet Metro said...

I can think of a new way to celebrate St. Patricks Day...

kalki said...

I can't believe they burst your boob in transit! Ridiculous. But right now I'm dying of suspense wondering if you got the hoots...

snaps79 said...

So much for the luck of the Irish on this one, eh? I wonder where they order the new wangs from.

JP said...

That sucks!!! Totally need symmetry with the hoo hoo's. Hee...heee...Chesty O'Houlihan!! =)

eclectic said...

Hoots ahoy?? Hope you're having a good weekend, one way or another.

alan said...

Saturday afternoon, I just woke up and stopped by to see what was up. I'm guessing since there's no further info, you decided that reason was in order instead of extreme, and things went ahead yesterday.

Although extreme can be nice in certain circumstances...like crushing and sexy Canadian girls...

Thinking of you!

alan

kerrianne said...

Irish boobies! You needs you some Irish boobies! ;)

Hope you got them yesterday!