Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Monday, October 15, 2007

An Update and a Physical Anomaly

My dad came home today from the hospital and is carefully lurching around on his own with his giant crutches. I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned this but my dad is 6’5” and my mom is 5’3”. His crutches are literally almost as tall as she is.

Anyway, I got to hand over his briefcase and cell phone and he resumed his role as boss man of his business. Instead of his executive chair he is ruling the roost from the couch. I have taken a secondary role as his legs for the next month or so until he can get around on his own again.

Thanks so much for all your kind comments.

So while I cannot say I am stress free I am not at def-con 5 at this time.

In other news:

Presently I am going through an invisible stage in my life. Periodically I seriously wonder if people cannot see me because my days revolve around dodging vehicles and pedestrians who fling themselves in front of my car. I obsessively check to see if my headlights are burnt out because I just cannot believe how often I get cut off and swerved into. People fly out from dark alleys and from between cars while I slam on my brakes stopping only millimeters from their bodies. Trying to get service is next to impossible as sales clerks and wait staff walk by me like I don’t exist. People don’t return my calls or email. I could probably walk around naked and not get a second look. During these odd times I endeavor to go about my life as safely and self sufficiently as possible until my personal molecules coagulate back into a visible entity and I can get around again as a fully visible member of society.

Anybody else ever have this problem?

15 comments:

alan said...

It's not you, and you certainly are too cute to get away with what you suggest!

It's just they are too self-absorbed to notice they are trying to kill themselves!

alan

Anonymous said...

It's not you, it's them. Is your car horn working? It's there to warn people of imminent danger. You can't help it if your hand gets stuck on it for six or seven seconds.

Glad your dad is making progress!

Babs said...

My son tells me it's the clear coat they put on the cars now. Makes 'em invisible. LOL
Glad to hear poppa is on the mend.

Anonymous said...

babs, I think your son is correct. my flaming yellow car was hit last week. while i was sitting at a light. the guy claims he didn't see me. did i mention the car is FLAMING YELLOW? i had just finished telling my co-worker that the car is invisible after we had gotten cut off twice getting out of the parking lot...

Anonymous said...

I used to have a beige car I called the Stealth Tempo (like the stealth bomber - invisible) because people pulled out in front of me so much. If I had painted some wobbly green splotches on it, it would have been camouflaged. As for myself, yes I often feel invisible. I think it comes from being the middle child.

Anonymous said...

I was just thinking the same thing this weekend, as I walked around in a shopping mall. People were blindly walking right toward me, almost staring through me, as if I wasn't there. If I didn't move out of the way, I would have had multiple collisions! Crazy...

lawyerchik said...

It's not you, it's them. Sharkey's right: the horn is there for a reason! :)

One year, I was driving from Michigan to Alabama (down I-75) during a snowstorm, and this huge 18-wheeler tried to keep me from entering his lane (in my little '98 Honda Civic).

I still have the lug nut scars on my rear bumper to prove it.

Since he chose to ignore my horn, the only way I knew to make sure he could see me was to raise my arm as high as I could out my window.... Can't remember if fingers were extended or not..... ;)

Anonymous said...

God you crack me up. Every time.

HAR said...

Unfortunately I am too fat to be invisible. Even in my car.

Today I felt like running someone over.Send some crazy pedestrians over by me.

I am glad Dad is home and back in charge. You are really a good daughter Kranki.

east village idiot said...

Wow. I'm so sorry to hear about your dad's accident. Hope that he is recovering well - he certainly is in good hands with you around!

Do you feel invisible? Is there something on your mind that stops you from having a full presence lately? I've been down that road - but for me it's usually tied to being a bit down.

here today, gone tomorrow said...

I'm glad your Dad is home. I'm sorry to hear about the invisibility; it will pass.

Heidi said...

I am invisible on a regular basis. That is why I lurk and never leave comments. I really enjoy reading your blog. However, due to my invisibility, I bet you won't be able to see this comment.

Squirl said...

My driving style is fairly aggressive so I don't get cut off very often. But I make sure I don't cut other people off either. Sometimes, when I'm walking with Ichabod, he'll cut me off as we go around a corner. I don't get it.

Glad to hear your dad's getting around again.

eclectic said...

Yay for Dad! If you're invisible, it's only because everyone's walking around with their eyes closed... so Shawkey's right, it's time you gave them a chance to use their ears. ;)

Anonymous said...

I remember standing looking at some videos at my local shop and a guy came up and stood right on my foot! Not just for a second, no, he stood there perusing the new releases standing on my foot! It was the craziest thing.