Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Friday, August 29, 2008

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-You Can Lead A Cat To A Kitten But You Can't Make Her Like Him. Who Am I Kidding, You Can't Lead A Cat Anywhere.AC

Here is the kitteh update you’ve all been asking for.

How is Yoshi doing? Well…not great but not terribly awful either. She stopped eating all together a couple days ago and still occasionally (meaning pretty much every day) yaks bile which, I’ve discovered, leaves a lovely green stain on my carpet. Who said having cats was not like having kids? My berber disagrees.

So I started getting desperate and bought all sorts of yummy things Yoshi might successfully ingest with no luck. I vacillated wildly between guilt and exasperation. It was not pretty around here.

I tried to push the limits a little by keeping the cats separated all of the time except in the evenings when I allowed them to be in the same room with each other-supervised for fair play and safety. And the thing is that Yoshi, while not happy, was fairly calm and resigned to Dexter flinging his noodley kitten body all over the living room. She didn’t even blink when he chased a toy under her chair or ran close to her head. One night, when I was playing with Dexter and some toys she jumped down from her perch and crouched about two feet away to watch us, her eyes never leaving the kitten or the feather wand.

I thought I was seeing a very faint glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. Not so much because Dexter started really wanting to be with Yoshi and to approach her and play with her and if he so much as looked in her direction that is when the hissing, spitting, and growling frothed up in full vitriolic volume. Only on Yoshi’s part as Dexter is probably the most laid back kitten I’ve ever met. Nothing fazes him at all.

So as I watched Yoshi losing weight and some days getting worse instead of better I started thinking that maybe this whole kitten idea was just not meant to be and that Yoshi simply couldn’t handle a new addition. I resigned myself to returning the kitten after the long weekend and feeling very incredibly horrible about it.

Then I saw this.

And I got MAD! People introduce new cats and dogs into their house all the time with little or no problems. I saw all those cats living together in harmony and I decided I wasn’t going to let a 9lb cat with a bad attitude run my household.

But I wanted a medical assurance that pushing her further wasn’t going to jeopardize her health. So off to the vet we went today and this is what she said:

-I do not have to get rid of the kitten!

-Yoshi is an exceptionally high-strung cat.

-It is possible if a cat has not eaten for a very long time for their whole digestive system to shut-down permanently and they can die.

-Yoshi is not even close to this stage.

-Yoshi has lost almost a pound this week but she is not underweight by any stretch.

-When a cat is stressed and vomits a lot their digestive tract gets all irritated and they lose their appetite. This is probably what is going on with Yoshi.

-They took blood and urine to rule out any other issues that might be complicating things.

-Being a jerk is not an official feline medical condition.

-I have to give her an antacid pill every night.

-I have to give her a syringe of laxative twice a day.

-I have to pry her stubborn Siamese lips open and force feed her a foul smelling cat mush every couple hours. Literally poke it down her gullet. Although she makes terrible noises and spits most of it out doing this will get her tummy working again and her appetite shall return. However, she will hate my ass for some time to come.

-This unanticipated and expensive vet visit means I will not be getting a new pair of winter boots next week.

The main thing I came away from the vet with is that while Yoshi is very high strung she only is so when it suits her. She did something similar to this several years ago when I went on holiday. I returned and that night she started vomiting uncontrollably and then started barfing blood. A visit to the emergency vet and almost $2000 later it was decided that she was stressed about my absence. And we all know what happened when I brought Lulu home. Yet every time I’ve moved into a new apartment she’s adapted just fine to her new surroundings. No hiding under the bed or anything. She was fine when I was going through treatment and in the hospital a lot. She acts totally freaked when the dogs come to visit or friends and family are over but the minute they leave she is all perky and cute like she didn’t just hiss and try to bite them. So there is definitely a component of my energy that is affecting her as well so I’ve got to get rid of all the guilt and fear and concentrate on visualizing exactly what I want to see happen in my house.

MY house.

Fight the feline power!

First co-mingling of death ray kitties- lasers on standby. Yoshi rasps, "Dexter, I am not your mother" *gaspgasp*

Second meeting-Yoshi is more relaxed. Dexter is trying to eat the kitty crate/cat jail/feline transport unit.

Third meeting. Dexter bogarts the kitteh drinking fountain. Yoshi is not amused. Barfs on my bed later to prove that bad manners go both ways.


von Krankipantzen said...

Please excuse the wacko formatting of this post. Blogger is seriously acting like an ass and adding letters where they don't belong (see end of title) and I have no idea what the fonts are trying to prove. And correcting above mistakes don't seem to be a option.

Also the kitten just farted and I am about to perish.

here today, gone tomorrow said...

You are a saint. Dexter is ridiculously cute. And I still love Yoshi.

Opera Gal said...

*pushes the paying for catfood button*

I am off to see if the Kings accepts PayPal donations.

Sharkey said...

You know, as I read the beginning of this post I thought, "Kranki, ya gotta start fighting fire with fire." Then by the end, it sounds like that's exactly what you're doing. Good for you! You're the boss here--not that (extremely cute, funny, and adorable) 9-lb. tyrant!

And of course, you're being all responsible about it with taking Yoshi to the vet and all. You're a good cat mama.

P.S. That video was amazing.

Anonymous said...

Stay strong, Kranki! All three of you are going to be fine: absolutely, positively, without-a-doubt, totally fine. No, it won't be as easy. No, it won't necessarily be quick. But it will all work out. Hugs & kisses to ALL of you...

P.S. That video = amazing

Ern said...

That's right, you're the boss! Yoshi will get over it!

Also, that Cat House on the Kings place is amazing.

Anonymous said...

glad you took yoshi to the vet- always better to make sure all is just in her head and not something for real.

i do worry about kitties that do not eat for several days in a row.

when i returned home from a wedding in june, nettie stopped eating. she was fine, I did a physical exam on her. so I tried several different hard foods and then right after I made a vet appointment for her, I tried the "fancy feast" in little cans

she ate she wants it everyday, but she does not get it.

hang tough with queen yoshi


Calamity Jen said...

It seems that female cats are never happy about new companions (or, to them, intruders). Our Molly is still bitter about our latest addition, Cayman, who has been around for two or three weeks now. Trooper, on the other hand, just loves the little guy to bits, playfighting with him and even bathing him. This information isn't particularly helpful to you unless you are capable of turning Yoshi into a friendly male cat. At any rate, keep up the good fight. Yoshi may never like Dexter, but she'll learn to cope without starving.

jcesarmo said...

Hang in there...

Yoshi is going to come to her senses soon...

All the best!

mrtl said...

That's right, damnit. YOUR house.

You do lock her out of your bedroom at night, don't you? I'd hate to hear you've awakened to find a toe missing.

alan said...

Hopefully that new pair of winter boots will find it's way into your closet anyway...

Sorry about all the drama; trying to do something wonderful and having it turned about this way is truly not fair at all!

Our vet showed me something about picking them up by their necks to get them to open their mouths, but since Frankie is very agile and still has claws, I'm glad I haven't had to try!


Squirl said...

I'm glad Yoshi's coming around a bit now. I was worried about her, but figured she'd have to eat eventually. I hadn't thought about her digestive tract getting so irritated. You're a great cat mom.

It's so cool that Dexter's laid back. That will go a long way.

lawyerchik said...

Thanks for the update, Kranki! I'm glad that Yoshi is starting to accept the little fuzzball (at least a teeny bit). :) Here's hoping that by Christmas, they are the best of ... tolerate each other! :)

kalki said...

Is it wrong for me to find this all utterly hysterical? I mean, I know you are suffering and Yoshi is suffering and all, but holy hell you crack me up. Especially this: "Being a jerk is not an official feline medical condition."

Sorry about the boots. :(

Robin said...

ah, yoshi. but she's so worth it! (and i suspect she knows it!)