Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Thursday, April 20, 2006

I Can Smell My Visa Burning

I took Yoshi back to the vet for a follow up appointment after her course of antibiotics for her heinous breath. While she was on the drugs her breath was absolutely odorless yet I can detect a faint stink creeping back since she’s been off. Not nearly as bad as it was but no longer like angel farts. The vet thinks she has chronically inflamed gums and might need to be periodically put on antibiotics. The tartar on her teeth is so minimal for a cat her age that they do not think a cleaning would help at all. Ok. I can deal with that.

I have found through my various visits for Yoshi’s dramatics that many vets I have encountered are a very negative bunch. They “Tsk Tsk” a lot and suggest all sorts of expensive tests that don’t always have an appreciable benefit. I don’t know if they are covering their asses liability-wise or if it is common business practice to try to inflate a bill but it is not uncommon for me to wonder why they are being so pessimistic. **TWISTED UTERUS-Maybe you can tell me what you know about this. Is it taught in school?”** I understand that our precious boogies cannot tell us what is wrong but is there really a need to make me freak out that if I don’t get Yoshi’s aura cleansed she might die? Ok-I am kidding here but I am sure you know what I mean. Now I will say that not all vets are like this and I have encountered lovely vets who offer a ‘conservative-wait-and-see’ course of treatment along with a ‘no-expense-is-too-much’ approach and explain the benefits and risks of everything. I appreciate that as I think there is nothing quite as terrible as watching your beloved pet suffer through a treatment that does not offer significant gains AND then face financial ruin at the end of it all because you didn’t know any better.

Let me tell you what happened to me at the SPCA vet office the other day when I questioned the vet about a couple tests she suggested for Yoshi.

They did a blood test on Yoshi and a couple levels were slightly elevated. And when I mean slightly I mean only one point above normal range. The vet said that these elevations could indicate early disease or a stressed cat. Well, after Yoshi attached her body to my neck and left nail furrows in the back of my leather jacket I decided to go with the “stressed” diagnosis. However, I was willing to listen to her logic and go from there. She wanted to do a Feline Leukemia test as well as a Cat HIV test. I didn’t think it was necessary as Yoshi is an exclusively indoor cat with absolutely no exposure to any other fur beast that could transmit such things. But she said in light of possible chronic/long term infection in her mouth and the fact that kittens can get infected from their mother it might be a good idea. I agreed and they did the test and I did not begrudge the cost at all as I could see her point. Yoshi is negative for both. I credit the condoms I give her.

The other thing she wanted to do was a urine test for kidney function. The whole rigmarole to get a clean pee sample leaves a lot to be desired (you know how cats are) so I got the supplies and if I can get the pee I will take it in. If not then no biggie. I am not going to fret about it too much. Stress is Yoshi’s middle name; not mine.

As I was getting Yoshi all tucked away into her carrier the vet flung one last idea out there for me to consider. “How about a rabies vaccination?” Yoshi is terribly allergic to vaccines and it is on her chart that she should never get them. She is at an increased risk of cancer at the needle site and as a single indoor cat at very low risk for contagious diseases. Also she had been fully vaccinated (including rabies) three times in kittenhood. I think those immunities still stand and recent research agrees with me. So why she would suggest a vaccine was puzzling. Especially rabies for an inside cat. I asked her why. This is the answer I got.

“Well, what if a bat flies into your house and bites the cat.”

Honestly, I looked around expecting to see a camera crew and a jokey video show host jump out at me with a big cheque. No such luck. She was shit serious. Yeah, and I guess monkeys could fly out of my butt and bite her too. I have never seen a bat in my area nor have I EVER heard of a bat flying into anybody’s house. I have screens in my windows too. God.

I said that I thought I would take my chances and deal with a bat bite as it happens. She nodded and said that was certainly an option as well. Of course with a foreboding tone of voice implying that I am a really shortsighted and neglectful owner.

Ok. I can live with that. In fact I’ll go one step farther. If Yoshi gets rabies from being bitten by a bat that has flown in through my apartment window (or out of my ass) I will jump out at the vet with a big cheque and a camera crew.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Yeah, and I guess monkeys could fly out of my butt and bite her too."

LOL, I freaking love you! You rock.

KULA said...

I thought it was mandatory for cats to be vaccinated too. All I know is that Suki got her rabies shot right before I got her!

I think they're most likely just trying to cover their asses from liability.

Anonymous said...

I have no idea about anything related to cats...I'm a doggie person and have ummm, a few of them. I'm also clueless about vets padding bills or anything else for that matter. What has me totally cracking up is the idea that bats would fly in through your screened windows (or out of your ass) and the visual of Mr. Fundt and his t.v. crew being there when it occurred! Now THAT would be great television! Heeheeheee...

Anonymous said...

I think most vets are an ethical bunch and don't purposely pad bills with unnecessary tests, but I do think they want to cover all the angles because they can't speak to their patients. I also think there's just so much more for vets to know than human doctors (dog anatomy, cat anatomy, bird anatomy, etc.), so perhaps they rely heavily on testing to define problems. That's just a guess on my part, though.

As for rabies, if the vet insists, you could always have a rabies titre done to see if Yoshi still has the proper amounts of rabies antibodies. I wouldn't worry about a bat, but I might worry about Yoshi biting someone (under what circumstances, I don't know), and then animal control freaking out about her vaccination status. I think the vaccine would protect Yoshi against idiots, as opposed to protecting her against bats.

One last thing... I think you wrote previously about extracting urine samples from cats using a syringe. This is the technique our vet uses for all our pets, and it doesn't seem to bother the pets in the least. One of our dogs and cats has to have it done a few times a year and they don't seem at all traumatized. I don't know if that makes you feel better, but thought I'd put it out there anyway.

alan said...

I hope it all turns out OK, I love that little kitty! (and her Mom!)

alan

Opera Gal said...

well, you better send me a check!! I lived in an apt that had a fireplace, and a bat did live in there, and decided to fly all around the apartment one night, and the cat I had at the time, Alex (RIP)went crazy chasing that thing all over. Luckily, he didn't get it, but the animal control people insisted he be tested for rabies anyway.

so um, yeah, it does happen.

hemlock said...

I would have thought the exact same thing "ARE YOU INSANE???". Good luck with the bats.

We brought our one cat in for a check up on his teeth and the vet started the whole "you are clearly negelecting this animal because his teeth look like this" routine. We didn't have the cash to deal with it at that time, so we let it go and added a bit of kibble to his soft food diet. Then a few months later when we had moved and a teeth cleaning was an option we took him to another vet. They said "you can clean them if you want to, but no big deal". Fine. I'm not cleaning them.

Anyhow, I think some vets are just far more anal about stuff like that, but they certainly shouldn't make you feel like shit. That's lame.

I adored your condom comment. What a good mommy.

Squirl said...

Monkeys flying out of your butt. Bucky would be so proud.

Candy said...

When the bat invasion comes you let me know and I will send my boys up to squash them for you. But im thinking you two will be ok.


Just dont turn on any bat shaped signal lights, that always brings them right to you.

Closet Metro said...

Next Friday dress Yoshi up as Vicki Vale and see what happens.

Philosophical Karen said...

Bats. Who knew?

Anonymous said...

fuel forgot to mention that after we had ridded our home of the critter, we looked it up in "the book" (what book?), and discovered what to do to trap a bat...you sneak up beside it with a paper towel roll and it will happily climb inside, to get away from the howling cats/cat parents, and then you can safely move it over to the window where it will fly off into the night.
simple.
we tried covering it with a t-shirt (the way you are supposed to catch birds that fly into your house) and it SCREAMED, I kid you not.
kkdowning

eclectic said...

You seriously made me laugh out loud with this! Bats?? That's the best she had? Bwahahahaha!! Good for you for calling bullshit. Or batshit...whatever.

Anonymous said...

Replying to Dagny...

I agree that pets are a luxury/priviledge, and that people shouldn't have pets unless they have some plan for how to care for them properly (and yes, caring for them properly usually means a minimum of about $200 a year in vet bills for one cat).

I think we all complain about ANY bills we have to pay... but also, a lot of people don't know about vet insurance, which is a good idea especially if you have an animal who tends to get sick a lot.

I guess in my experience in northern, middle american farmtown, it seems like the vets here are expecting you to either not take good care of your pets, or to tell them you dont want to pay. My previous comment here, I was griping not about the fact that I had to pay, but that they didn't want to tell me over the phone how much I'd have to pay when I arrived to pick my girl up. I honestly think they've had people tell them they can just keep the animal if it's gonna cost that much. I can't imagine! I just wanted to know how deep it was going to cut me! (Check book? Charge Card? PLATINUM card??)