Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Monday, March 06, 2006

Complimentary Tranquillizers

It is sad. I was thinking about what I could post about today and I suddenly remembered this great story. I started forming the tone of the story in my mind as I usually do before I sit down to type and, hmmmmm, I started thinking to myself that the story seemed a little familiar. I wondered if I had ever mentioned it in a comment or something. Nope. Totally wrote about it already. I had to look. I’ve been blogging for just over a year and I am starting to repeat myself. Oh god.

I wish I could say that I immediately thought of a brilliant new story to write about for your reading pleasure but that didn’t happen either.

Life is, well, boring right now.

I suppose after what my last year entailed this is a good thing.

But not fun for you guys.

So I am going to give you a run down of my last few boring days and you will just have to deal with it.


Hold on. I have to go look at my Day-Timer to see what I did. It is that memorable.
Ok, I am back. I tried to watch a couple DVDs I got from my mail-in rental service and both sucked so bad I just put them back in their envelopes and mailed them off unwatched. Then my mom popped over for a visit and we talked about mundane life stuff. After she left I went downstairs and started doing some laundry.

*Mrtl Style Tangent*
I have this total pet peeve with my neighbours. The majority of them will go down and start a load of laundry (or five) and then just abandon their stuff in the washer/dryer. I HATE IT when I have to haul somebody’s clothes out of the washer and/or dryer because I KNOW it is not like they just leave them for an hour or two but there is ALWAYS 3-6 abandoned loads in varying states of dampness/mildew/crispy dryness piled all over the counter and machines and those loads will stay down there for several days, if not WEEKS, before they are collected. And this usually happens only when the owners go down to do more laundry so those old loads are quickly replaced with new abandoned ones. Doesn’t anybody run out of underwear? I have a weeks worth and then I am FORCED to do laundry. Let me tell you if I was manager of this place there would be a 48 hour time limit and then any left laundry would be chucked in the garbage. I am a hard-ass that way.
*End Mrtl Style tangent*

I wrestled with several piles of homeless laundry to get my 3 loads done in a timely manner. Everything was dried and removed from the premises by night’s end.

Later that night I chatted with my upstairs neighbour in the hallway who I am pretty sure is the most heavy-footed individual on the planet. He is a very nice guy so it is difficult to loathe him. However, I managed a fairly healthy hate-on the next morning when he started dragging furniture around his apartment at 8:30 am. On a SUNDAY, people. That could get you killed in some neighbourhoods.

So here we are on Sunday.

I did a very tidy job of frittering away several hours on the computer. I have no recollection of what I did exactly but before I knew it it was time for The Oscars. I was planning on boycotting the whole thing as I inevitably find it very dull but since it didn’t really interfere with my later TV watching plans I turned the sucker on. I was not disappointed. Two words – BO-RING!! I have to admit that I have not watched most of the movies nominated. I guess I could blame that on my cancerous year but I rarely see films in the theatre anyway. Don’t know why. Usually by the time I decide I should see the film it is gone. I am not that spontaneous, I guess.

I made channa masala (curried chickpeas) for dinner and I then watched Bad Boys 2 for the single reason that it features a small role with my boyfriend, Henry Rollins. He was on the first 15 minutes and never seen again. I didn’t know this and watched the whole damned thing. Not great. Then I watched a show about cancer. Then bed.

I know. Really exciting.

Today I read blogs, watched talk shows, and ate curry leftovers. I made an appointment to get my hair cut next week too.

The truth is that my anxiety is very bad so staying close to home is very comforting right now. It also doesn’t help that I have no money to do fun stuff like see movies or shop or eat out. Home is a good place for me right now.

But this makes for a very tedious blogging for you.


Anonymous said...

Oh hunny, it only seems tedious to you I'm thinkin'. Anxiety is such a bitch. It is all going to be alright and you will figure it all out. You spent so long working at getting you have to re-learn being well. Peace.

Closet Metro said...

For someone with not much to say, you manage to say it well. Me, I just don't post. I'm mysterious like that. "Is Dave so busy that he can't find time to write? Is his life that exciting and active that he just can't squeeze in a quick post?" Nope.

Every weekend can't be a heroin binge-sex with rock stars-crash your Ferrari-puke on your Armani-fest. (I can barely muster the energy to do that more than once or twice a season.) Sometimes you just have to keep your couch company.

katietoyboy said...

Dear Krankipoos,

This is the calm after the storm and it must be difficult to find activities that cater for your energy levels/bank balance. But never fear, I have a project for you ... show us before and after photos of your bootylicious hair. We want smoke and mirrors included ( ok maybe not smoke ). Make the most of this down time because when you get your career up and running, you will be throwing longing glances at your couch when you are rushing out to work/social live. Take care

ScottyGee said...

You need to have a wild orgy with the Canadian curling team so you can have something to post about. Come on! I'd do it for you. =)

Lame weekends rule. Nothing to be ashamed about. That's what they are for. That and haviing an orgy.

Precisiongirl said...

Boring? You did see the pictures I posted? A doll and a DVD boxset...

Gotta see piccies of your new hair (when you get it). I'm glad we couldn't get the Oscars (you have to have satellite tv to watch it), I would have watched all of it too, and wasted hours of my life.

Keep your pretty chin up Ms. Kranki. Your body and head have been so used to high drama cancer ass kicking, you need to re-train them to relax and recover.

I'd much rather hear that you're bored, as opposed to going back into hospital because you're sick.

Take care, x

kassi said...

Sometimes boring is necessary...enjoy it while it lasts.

Candace said...

I still like reading about your life, even though you say it's boring. I'm glad to be a part of it!

kalki said...

Don't apologize - this blog is for you! And besides, I actually do like hearing about the everyday details of a person's life. One of the things I love to ask people is "How do you spend your Saturdays?" I never expect a wild and crazy answer; I just like to hear about when they do their laundry and what they eat for lunch. Maybe that's odd, but I think it's interesting.

hemlock said...

Kranki: No worries about your 'boring' post. This is your blog, your place to do whatever the hell you want. If we don't want to read about crusty/damp/mildewy laundry, that's our problem

Then again, I found that part very funny.

I don't quite understand how people can just leave their stuff like that. I'm a task completion kind of gal.

I hope your anxiety moves on soon. It's never fun.

Dima said...

Oh, I hated those laundry people in the dorms. And not until halfway through the first semester did I realize that I can take their stuff out and throw it on the floor if I wanted.

I agree with Scott (I know, that never happens), but lame weekends are the best! I don't agree with the orgy part, because I'm not a weirdo like Scott who inserts orgy to everything!

Adrienne said...

We have those laundry people here too. It's funny, I'll go down there and look, and the washers all have wet clothes in them. I HATE touching wet clothes it gives me the willies, even though I know they're clean.

So I'll wait. Hours later, I'll finally muster up the nerve to move the person's clothes, and as soon as I start to do it, they walk in and give me this "why you touching my clothes?" attitude, as if I was gonna steal some random guy's wet boxers.

Squirl said...

My mother lives in an apartment complex with 12 apartments in each building. Each building has only one washer and dryer. People should know better than to leave laundry in a situation like that. My mom, and now my brother as mom is not strong enough to do laundry, always feel bad about taking somebody else's stuff out. Not me! It's their fault if they leave it, they're inconveniencing me and I'm not gonna take it. :-)

I also hate having loud people living over me. Drives me absolutely nuts. That's why I want a house next. Nobody above, below or directly on either side.

And, as you can tell, we love your posts even if you think they're boring.

mrtl said...

But honey, you're living the boring CANCER FREE! Woot!!

MrsDoF said...

Hardly ever go to the movies, myself. There's no commercial break for going potty, and I'd be sitting in the dark with strangers, so I have to give up the arm rest. I always need to wrap the strap of my purse around my calf. No, I don't relax at a movie, not like if I wait for the dvd then watch and pause in my own living room.

I don't find the Oscars boring at all.
I love watching people, especially if a bosom is quite close to falling out of the flimsy gown, or a song with p*mp in the title gets the statuette (what on earth were they thinking?)
Besides, I got a whole and a half pot holder crocheted in that length of time, and my cat Mahalia got some lap time. All is well.

It's been 23 years since I had to carry laundry over to a wash house. I'll give my Kenmore front-loader an extra little pat on your behalf.

whfropera said...

now wait a minute...I was part of your saturday, AND we talked about laundry ...I think that rates at LEAST a mention in your actvities!!



stampydurst said...

While I was in Seattle on a rotation, I lived in a building with 3 washers and 3 dryers. One night, I put all my stuff in the dryer just as some a-hole was putting his stuff in the washers. Well, he kept opening and closing everything while I was there. The dryers were the kind that you have to push the start button everytime you open them. I went back down 5 minutes before the dryers were supposed to be done, and the dryer had been opened and not restarted. As I was getting ready to put more quarters in, the a-hole showed back up and wouldn't make eye contact. Ahhhh!

Keep the faith, honey. One day you'll miss being bored.

Von Krankipantzen said...

TRACI-that is a really good way to think about this time. Re-learning being well. Thanks for that.

CLOSET METRO-I am not sure if it is a gift or a curse but I have the uncanny ability to go on (and on!) about pretty much nothing. And I haven't had a pukey/heroin/sex night like that since my late teens. I should pencil in one for soon.

KATIETOYBOY-krankipoos=snicker! I will absolutely do the before and after hair shots.

SCOTTYGEE-I love men who sweep.

PRECISIONGIRL-actually seeing your blonde locks inspired me to get a new do. Your hair is so cute.

KASSI-I know that I will look back on these lazy times with fondness one day. I know it.

CANDACE-well whew! I am glad I haven't driven you to sleep.

KALKI-are you sure? Boring stuff? Really?

LEAFGIRL77-I guess you are right. I just want to be entertaining. The party gal.

DIMA-yeah. Somebody actually said something to me once about how come I didn't fold their laundry when I took it out of the dryer and that I was rude not to do that. I told them it was because I would be folding their laundry every week and I am not their mother.

ADRIENNE-that always happens!!! I hate wet laundry too. I don't like touching strangers undies.

SQUIRL-I dream about that too. Or just living on the top floor. I'd take that right now. I'd could have moved upstairs last year but the apartment is so dumpy and has low ceilings. My place is nicer.

MRTL-you are so right. I mustn't forget that.

MRSDOF-I am totally the same way. I have a hard time sitting through a movie. Or not talking through one. And yes, plese give your front loader a hug from me.

OPERAGAL-I am soooo sorry. I didn't write that down (I have now) and had forgotten. My chemo brain is still a big problem. I forget EVERYTHING! We had a lovely internet chat and talked about all sorts of stuff. It was the highlight of my day. Seriously.

Von Krankipantzen said...

STAMPY-I HATE that! I lived in a building too where that was a prob. One guy dumped our laundry right where he had spilled bleach. Ruined all sorts of stuff and just said, "Oh." when confronted. No apology. People suck.

eclectic said...

This is giving me flashbacks to my days in the dorm... wet laundry, creepy people touching my laundry, can't find an open washer even though no one is around for over a half-hour... Gah! I'll pat my W/D for you, too; I'll have plenty of opportunity today as I've got about 8 loads to do...

circe said...

For a boring weekend, you did a terrific job writing about it! What flair, my dear..... :)
Oh, and sorry about the abandoned laundry. I would be so pissed about that, it wouldn't be funny! I would DUMP it on the floor and use the machine. Ok, I don't think I'd actually be that mean but I would darn sure THINK about dumping it on the floor!!!

Bucky Four-Eyes said...

I believe in the use of electric cattle prods on people who insist on abandoning their clothes in the washer/dryer that I would like very much to use, but can't because it is full of their abandoned laundry. ZZZZZZZZZT!

And curried chickpeas sounds reallllly good.