Life in the Slow Lane

Life in the Slow Lane

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Sunday Blues

I am just exhausted. My new downstairs neighbour had a party last night. He is actually an old neighbour as he used to live in the attic suite a year ago. We were all glad to hear that the previous downstairs neighbour was moving out. He was weird. First of all he would sit on the front porch and drink beers until he was drunk. Often he had friends with him. Let’s just say you really didn’t want to have to walk by them to get into your apartment as they would get really creepy. You know, sorta get too close and smarmy. The second thing he used to do was play music and video games at supersonic volume. The whole house used to vibrate. I know from the other four tenants that have lived in the downstairs suite during my own tenancy that it really takes some serious volume for noise to bleed through. In fact, it wasn’t until Creepy Guy moved in that I knew you could actually hear stuff from that suite.

So last night when it became obvious that there was to be a party downstairs I was not too worried. There have been plenty of parties down there over the years and I have never heard much. I have to admit I was a little hurt that I was not invited to the party. I would not have gone but it would have been nice to be invited. It has normally been a tradition here to invite all the fellow tenants to a party as they will have to hear it anyway with such close quarters and all. I have always invited all my neighbours to every get-together I have hosted. I would have been happy to have them but mostly it was just as a courtesy so they would feel ok about coming by if the noise went on too late. I always give them my phone number in case they need to call me. My next-door neighbour was at the party last night; I heard her voice. I know it probably didn’t occur to New Neighbour Who Is Also Old Neighbour to invite me, as he knows that I am sick right now. But still. It would even have been nice to be warned.

In any case last night’s party was a little out of the ordinary and I am a little pissed off about it. First of all I was sleeping away and at around midnight my door buzzer started beeping away like crazy. I ignored it as I thought that maybe somebody had made a mistake with apartments. Earlier on in the evening somebody had buzzed me looking for the party. I knew they would see soon enough where the party was. I had just dropped off to sleep again and my buzzer rang AGAIN! I got up that time and it became obvious that some assclown at this party had moved onto the front porch and was leaning against the intercom panel. Not cool but it happens. The only problem was that now I was up. And I couldn’t get back to sleep.

I have been living here for more than five years and over this time I have become very familiar with the noises that the house makes. I know the sound of the basement door banging shut. I know the sound of the bike lock as one of my neighbours locks up his bike when he gets home from work. I know the sound of the creaking floor when my next-door neighbour walks to her living room from her bedroom. I know the sound of the racoons that shit on my fire escape. Last night this noise started that I had never heard before. It was an intermittent banging noise from downstairs that made my picture frames rattle against the walls. I have no idea what this noise was except it went on until 4 am. That is right. I did not get back to sleep until after 4 am.

And it has started again this morning at 9:30. I still have no idea what this noise is. I can tell you this. I really wish it would stop.

So why didn’t I go downstairs and complain? Well, for a couple of reasons. First of all I am have to admit I am a little old to be living in this place. This house is more suited to a younger crowd. Most people my age are married with kids and a lucrative career and live in much cushier digs. I am single and make very little money. I can afford the rent. Barely. So I try to give my younger neighbours a bit of slack. I am already known as a bit of a crankypants round here with my “high standards’ and all. From a previous post you know I have a strict criteria I follow before I complain about noise. It either has to wake me up and/or keep me up at night. Or if the music is loud enough that I can sing along with the words I will complain. Or if it is loud enough that I have to up my own TV volume to compensate I know it is too loud. Last night’s banging does fall into the first category. But the fact is that I am so sick and tired of complaining about obvious shit. I don’t wear shoes on my hard wood floor and I try not to be heavy footed. I don’t crank my tunes and if I want to rock-out I use headphones. I don’t use my subwoofer as the vibrations carry too far. Normal bass is enough for me. I turn down my TV at 11 pm if I am going to stay up late. If I am doing home improvement projects I try to finish by 6 pm so I am not hammering through a dinner hour. I don’t talk loudly in the common hallways and keep the front door and my door from slamming shut behind me. These are very obvious things I do so I don’t intrude upon my neighbours’ peace and quiet but these are the same things I constantly have to tolerate from them. And I am so sick of it. The main reason I didn’t go downstairs last night is that I am sick of being the one to complain all the freaking time. I would love to move but I simply can’t afford it. I have a really good deal here. Well, obviously not that good of a deal.

I am soooooo tired.

**Update-Monday Aug 8th
My next door neighbour was NOT at this party after all. I seriously thought I heard her voice but I was mistaken. I don't feel so bad about my lack of invite now. It was silly to think that way as I am practically old enough to be this kid's mother. Who wants their mother at their party?

***another update-Downstairs Dude just bought brand spanking new speakers and a subwoofer. FUCK ME!


Closet Metro said...

Aww. Poor Krank. Take a nap.

I used to live in a house where the downstairs neighbors were in a band. They only practiced during the day, while most everybody was at work, so I rarely heard them, but if I was home during the day, it was Really Loud.

One evening I brought home an "assemble it yourself" entertainment center cabinet thingie. I started putting it together at about 9 at night, figuring it'd take me an hour or so to assemble. There was much banging on the damn thing to get it together. Eventually, I heard banging coming from downstairs. WTF? Are they banging on the ceiling? What's their problem it's only about ten or so, right? *checks clock* 12:45am. Nevermind. Sorry guys.

mrtl said...

Geez Kranki. That sucks.

Precisiongirl said...

Dearest Kranki, I so know what you are going through.

Jode and I (up until recently) had to put up with excessive noise in our block. The flat on the ground floor (we are on the second) always played loud club-type music at the most inopportune moments, at a volume that would wake the dead. Sometimes I would feel the vibrations in my feet, and downstairs' ornaments would fall off the shelves. They would also have really loud and graphic arguments that would stir you from whatever you were doing.

It really sucks as you don't want to be a killjoy that complains a lot, yet you don't want to be a pushover and be held hostage in your own flat.

In the end I put on my dork hat and got other tenants to sign my self-styled big complaint letter to our landlord. It kind of worked - but I've gone from kooky youngster to librarian before my time...

Best of luck with it all, x

Squirl said...

Oh, I hate rude neighbors. I've ranted about my own before. Can't you just call the cops at some point? They don't have to tell the rude group who called. I am so sorry for you and your lack of sleep. I've missed out on plenty of sleep due to neighbors, too. But I'm healthy. You need your rest!

Anonymous said...


I hate nights like that. Living here in the East Village you get some summer evenings when the "bridge and tunnel" crowd come into the 'hood, get wasted and start screaming, vomiting and pissing all over the place - this usually occurs at around 3 or 4 in the morning. Do you see me taking a commuter train to Summit, New Jersey and dropping my knickers so I can pee on someone's lawn at 2 am? Sometimes I'm tempted to!

We'll all have those "put up with someone else's wall of sound" nights. It just friggin sucks.

when you complete your chemo, we'll all come visit you and a have a led zepplin tribute night. that should settle the score.

east village idiot said...

oops that was me.

JessicaRabbit said...

Ok you take a nap and I will be right over with my saint bernard, she can run amok sounding like a heard of elephants while we have very loud, very satisfying crazy sex.

Ill be there in a few hours mmmmmkay?


LadyBug said...

You sound like an ideal neighbor. I'm sorry your neighbors are so inconsiderate.

Hope you get some rest soon.

Von Krankipantzen said...

C-metro-I know we all have our moments. Mine was when I installed my hardwood floors. Had a couple late-ish nights with that. But overall I am a freakin' saint.

Mrtl-It can really suck. And make me kranki.

precision girl-loud neighbours really suck. Especially when you are quiet like me. Looks like you got the problem solved at your place. Right on! Those arguments are horrible to hear. I used to have neighbours who beat each other up. For fun. Was glad to see them go.

Sqirl-I wish we were neighbours!

Eastvillageidiot-absolutely we should have a Kings Of ROCK night. I have threatened to crank up Sabbath and leave for a weekend. Also that night of the party was fireworks night here in my area and the rednecks truly amaze me. Similar to your situation. I wanna yell, "Peaople LIVE here, ya know!" out the window. The stuff I see and hear. Morons.

JessicaRabbit-sounds good to me. As long as we can crank up Sabbath as well. MmmmmmKAY!

Von Krankipantzen said...

Oh SHIT! Ladybug-your comment got lost there for a sec. - you are too kind. Basically I am just a crabby old lady in this joint.

spoonleg said...

I'll kick his ass for you!!

Seriously, some people are so inconsiderate. I had to put up with that same shit when I was living in college apartments. I NEVER threw parties and was always quiet and private and respectful of others. I can't say the same for any of my neighbors.

Thank god now I live in a quieter environment where the only noise is the people who live down the hall beating their children with shoes as they come up the stairs (once they get inside the noise is muffled).

spoonleg said...

I'll kick his ass for you!!

Seriously, some people are so inconsiderate. I had to put up with that same shit when I was living in college apartments. I NEVER threw parties and was always quiet and private and respectful of others. I can't say the same for any of my neighbors.

Thank god now I live in a quieter environment where the only noise is the people who live down the hall beating their children with shoes as they come up the stairs (once they get inside the noise is muffled).

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LeaLea said...

I am just starting to read your blog now..and will be back. But wanted to say you look beautiful with the short hair..i mean obviously you didn't get that hairdo on purpose and yet--not everyone can wear it and "look like it's on purpose"--but you really look GREAT with short hair!
Beautiful beautiful beautiful!

snaps79 said...

You're the best neighbor ever. You can move into my hood, into the duplex below me, ANY time.

Vanessa said...

I, too, lived in my last apartment for five years, a duplex, and saw a lot of shit and complained very little. I just moved, however, two weeks ago and don't have to put up with my awful neighbor any longer. I feel for you, Krank, really! And you are such a considerate neighbor. Wish you were mine!

Von Krankipantzen said...

spoonleg-you could so kick his ass. Could I watch? I would also love to see you beat those parents with a shoe until they were muffled.

lealea-thanks for that. I just went outside of the house with it the other day. Got some funny looks but not too many in this hood.

HDL-I don't know if I could survive in your hood. Larry would eat me alive.

Vanessa-congrats on getting out of there. Woo hoo! I wish I could be your neighbour too.