More Rant For Your Buck

Part 2 of Thursday’s Rant.

So here a little story about what happened to me when I went to the local health food store for a bottle of acidophilus pills.

Several months before I was diagnosed with cancer I decided to visit the health food store as my stomach had been giving me some trouble. Certain foods seemed to make me feel bloated and out of sorts. I thought a simple little bottle of acidophilus might get my gut bacteria back on track again. Nothing else major was going on with me health-wise to cause me concern. The lady who ran the store was very helpful and started asking me all sorts of questions while looking my symptoms up in a very well thumbed reference book she had behind the counter. With such vague symptoms like bloating and strange pooping issues and burping she told me that I needed digestive enzymes as well as the acidophilus. Then she said I needed activated charcoal as well. Then she said I needed a colon cleansing kit as well. That means a special diet and many pills over a 10 day period to literally clean your bowels out.

I told her that I had done a digestive cleanse twice in my life and with the second one I had to stop within just a couple days because I got such bad abdominal cramps. Like so bad I couldn’t stand up kind of cramps. She then went on to say that maybe I needed a liver cleanse as well. So many ‘as wells’ that had upped my potential bill to well over $200. I told her I didn’t think my liver was an issue and that I thought I’d just stick with my original plan to do acidophilus pills.

Well, the nice lady put down her book and took out a quartz crystal on a chain and proceeded to ask the crystal what kind of treatment I really needed.

!

I have to admit that when I was very much younger my friends and I would use this pendulum fortune telling trick when asking excruciatingly important questions about boys but I had never thought to use it for diagnosing health problems. Yeah, I used such bizarre diagnostic tools like doctors and blood tests and such. If I’d known that a crystal could have done the same trick I might have saved myself all those pesky appointments.

Anyhoo…

So The Crystal told this nice lady that it was indeed my liver and that I needed a liver cleanse and other liver type supplements. And PRONTO!

While I was pretty much secretly snickering into my sleeve and faintly embarrassed over the situation I found myself in I told the nice lady I wasn’t going to buy all the stuff she wanted me to but I would do a cleanse and then come back for some acidophilus later. So the lady and her crystal recommended an extra gentle cleanse that would benefit my digestive tract AND my liver. Kill two birds blah blah blah…

Normally I would have just walked out and gone somewhere else so I could just buy my goddamned bacterial culture tablets in peace but I had been reading on a few blogs that other people had been doing cleanses as well and I thought, “What the heck?” Let’s try a cleanse as it might just do the trick.

So I got home and took my first course of pills and settled in for a night of laundry and TV watching. Within a few hours it was time to take my second course of pills which I did with a very simple veggie and rice dinner. So far so good.

I was feeling a bit queasy and unsettled by bedtime but I was feeling that way before I started the cleanse and that was why I wanted the acidophilus in the first place. So I didn’t really think much of it.

I woke at 2 am with a most terrible headache. I took a couple Tylenol but the pain got worse and worse very quickly. Really awful pain which made me rock in bed with a pillow over my face while crying. Like really bad. Now I’ve had migraines several times in my life and this was worse and very different from a migraine. This felt like my whole head was going to explode. For reals.

Then I got nauseous. Brutally nauseous. Then I started barfing. Barfing is not pleasant at the best of times but when your head is exploding it takes on a new level of hellishness. I felt absolutely vile.

Then the diarrhea started…and I officially entered a trifecta of physical nastiness.

I don’t remember much detail of that night but I do vividly recall washing my face in cool water in my bathroom and looking up into the mirror. What I saw shocked and, frankly, fascinated me. My skin colour was grey. Literally grey. A dark bluish grey. With a lovely tinge of green. I had never seen skin that colour ever. Well, that is not entirely true. I had seen corpses that colour on TV detective shows. You know the ones that have been left outside for a couple days? That colour. And it was now my very own personal colour. It was totally surreal.

It was at this time I thought that maybe I should go to the emergency room. What I did instead was take a shwack of codeine painkillers and pass out from sheer exhaustion.

The next day I did go to my doctor and he told me what had likely happened. He believed that I had a severe reaction to an herb in the cleanse, likely the burdock root, which made my blood pressure go up. Not just a little bit but dangerously high. I could have very easily had a stroke. Probably my young age and general good health saved me. Even 12 hours later my blood pressure was VERY high. And my doc was VERY upset. I didn’t dare tell him that I had done the cleanse on the advice of a crystal.

I returned the unused portion to the health food store and told the nice lady (and her crystal) what had happened. She started to cry. Maybe she thought I’d sue her. I just wanted my money back. I still wanted my acidophilus pills.

With this experience under my belt you can imagine how annoyed I get when people tell me (like my neighbour) that I should take ‘harmless’ herbal remedies for whatever ails me. People who look stuff up on the internet and consider themselves experts. Like the internet is a reliable source of information. HA! Very, very dangerous. There is also this belief that herbs and natural supplements are “safer” than Western medicine medications which is very untrue and a very dangerous assumption as well. I could have died from my ‘safe’ herbal remedy and I wouldn’t have been the first. People die from taking or mixing drugs both natural and ‘manufactured’ all the time. One must remember that herbal supplements are not tested or regulated by the FDA. Anybody can say that an herbal medication can do anything and do not have to prove it through tests and trials. Herbal supplements are also not quality controlled for potency or dosage like FDA regulated medications are.

So did I find a point to my tale? Yes, I did. Several points in fact. My points are these. Be smart. Don’t assume. Get your info from reputable sources and that DOESN’T include the internet. Anybody can post anything on the internet. When you read reference books check their sources and read those books as well. Don’t get lulled into a false sense of safety. Educate yourself and keep an open mind while doing it. And don’t listen to crystals no matter what they tell you.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Where's YoYo?

Is she in the warm and toasty Snoozen Housen?NO!

Is she in the snuggly and cuddly Snoozen Tuben?NO!

Where is Yoshi sleeping?


She's spooning with the nice hard wire shelf next to loud computer speakers.

Why do I bother?


Crushing her tail!


Hey! Gimme my tail back!


BACK OFF! I'm comfy!

A Cancer Rant With No Real Point

I ran into my next door neighbour in the hallway last night and had a wee chat. She is always very interested in my health but in a way I find somewhat alarming. Like last night she asked how I was feeling. I said, “Really good, thanks.” To which she then asked, “No re-occurrence yet?” Yes, meaning she had indeed casually enquired as to whether my cancer had returned yet.

Fabulous!

My answer? “Nooooooo…well, not that we know of.”

I mean, jeeeeez...

I usually take most of these kind of interactions in stride because for the most part I believe folks who ask probing (albeit inappropriate) questions and offer unsolicited advice really mean well. I’d like to think that it just comes out wrong sometimes. Sometimes VERY wrong.

I’ve mentioned that I have an in-law who has dealt with breast cancer under vastly different circumstances than me who has in the past declared that as long as I have a positive attitude I will be just fine. I truly agree with the spirit of her statement but really LOATHE how simplistic and, frankly Pollyannaish it sounds. I’ve had relatives who have died of cancer who had fantastic attitudes. I’ve also heard stories of people who were convinced they were going to die from cancer and then totally recovered. Obviously keeping a positive attitude isn’t the whole story of cancer recovery. The fact is that, yes, having a positive attitude can help you get through the vast mountains of shit you have to go through with cancer treatment but feeling tip top all the time just isn’t possible and no one should ever feel guilty about having a bad day, or days for that matter. There are times when you are convinced you are going to die or you feel like you cannot take one more second of the physical and mental tolls. Days where you hate that you are dependant on others and that this stupid disease has not only royally fucked up your life, even temporarily, but has also affected the lives of those you love. Nobody facing a terminal cancer diagnosis should ever be made to feel that they were not positive enough to cure themselves. In fact I would say that (in my opinion) if I met someone who didn’t have a bad day or twenty going through treatment I’d be pretty sure there was some serious denial of some pretty heavy duty feelings going on. And I believe that is more dangerous than being true to yourself and how you feel.

Ok-so thankfully my neighbour didn’t get into the whole attitude thing this time around but she did get into what I call the Uninformed Shoulds. This is when people tell you what you SHOULD be doing spewing off info they heard from their aunt or from the internet or some other Oracle of Extreme Truth. Once again I know this comes from a good place and I appreciate the sentiments but it can be trying at times.

My neighbour asked me if I was going to return to work in the film industry as things were busy and there was work to be had. I said that I didn’t think I would be up to doing that job again in the future. I mentioned that 18 hours days were no longer appealing as well as the fact I have had so much surgery on my right side I couldn’t do the heavy duty lifting or driving required. I didn’t get into the fact that my reluctance to return to the film industry is actually more an unwillingness to devote 100% of my waking moments to dealing with insane costume designers, needy actors, miscellaneous crew and other so-called creative folks. Honestly after this whole cancer debacle I just want to do something I enjoy and that is fulfilling. Washing strangers’ underwear, hemming pants and sitting in some desolate parking lot watching the sun come up and freezing my ass off while the director yells, “CUT!” one…more…time…no longer inspires me. Call me greedy but I want more.

Anyway, my neighbour told me that I should go to the local Yuppie Uber Trendy Hellishly Expensive Health Food Grocery Store and have them set up a vitamin regimen for me to detoxify my body from all the cancer drugs. I just hmmm’ed at this because I talked to my doctor about this very same concept and she replied that I could do that if I wanted but that it would really only take time, a good diet and exercise to get my body back to where it once was. She said that we North Americans have some of the most expensive urine in the world with all the stuff we take under the guise of healthiness. So when people say I SHOULD go and drop hundreds of dollars that I don’t have on the advice of somebody who knows nothing about my health situation or history I don’t get mad. I just remind myself of this pertinent question. Who do I listen to? The hippy at the health food store or my medically trained oncologist who works at one of the most well respected cancer treatment centers in the world?

I know there are a lot of people out there that feel that the drug companies and the medical establishment are out to dupe us all and that curing cancer is simply a matter of cutting out sugar or juicing organic foods. I totally agree that when there is medical treatment for profit that maybe things get out of whack and priorities get skewed but in Canada things are different. Our medical treatment is covered by the government so there isn’t the profit angle that there is in the US. Drug costs are regulated. The majority of medical research up here is done by hospitals and universities. You’d think that if things were that simple somebody would have let the cat out of the bag in some socialist first world country like Canada or the UK or France. I am all for a good conspiracy and am probably more suspicious than the average guy but I wonder how many drug company CEO’s or medical establishment members would thwart revealing an existing cancer cure when chances are they or their spouse or their kids will get cancer. 1 in 3 people will get cancer in their lifetimes. It doesn’t make sense.

Obviously there a balance to be struck between alternative health practices and western medicine. There ARE naturopathic things that can be helpful in treating cancer that compliment modern technology and I believe the cancer agency I am treated at offers a good mix of both. Along with my chemotherapy and radiation I was offered therapeutic touch, shiatsu massage, acupressure, acupuncture, yoga, fitness counseling, nutritional counseling, medical marijuana pills, individual counseling, and other types of supportive care. What I was strictly forbidden to do was to take herbal supplements or vitamins while under treatment as they could have interacted with my chemotherapy causing negative symptoms and even decreased the effectiveness of my treatment. So those helpful folks who are friends, relatives or just work at the vitamin store could, in their ignorance, cause you serious harm.

*start foreboding music*

I have an interesting story to tell that happened to me before I was diagnosed with cancer and started my blog that illustrates this issue. I’ll post about it on Monday.

And my point? Maybe I’ll figure one out by Monday as well.

Birthday Girlzzzzzzzz

This Saturday was Yoshi’s birthday. She is 9 years old. In my typical chemo-brain fashion I was awake for about 30 minutes and totally forgot it was her special day until my mom called to congratulate her feline grandchild. I assured Yoshi it was nothing personal as I had forgotten my own birthday as well.

Shopping for Yoshi Gifties is always hard as in typical Siamese fashion she hates pretty much everything. She hates cat treats. She hates all fresh, frozen or canned seafood except the oh-so-pedestrian tuna. I think she’d probably eat roast beast or pork or chicken if I’d feed it to her off my plate. Only problem with that is with me being vegetarian the only thing she’ll get off my plate is broccoli and that plain ol’ sucks ass. Even for me.

She doesn’t play with most cat toys preferring twist ties, q-tips and scotch tape. Cheap for me but not the most festive thing to gift wrap.

I mentioned recently that after a promising start she has abandoned the snoozen housen. Instead she remains enamored with the crappy old throw blanket I have folded on my chair. This thing is ok to look at but not very comfortable for humans in its taffeta slippery coolness. Strangely Yoshi loves it. I wash it often and each time I take it out of the dryer it has frayed along some seam requiring extensive hand sewing. I suspect its lifespan is nearing its end.

A Demonic Burrito

So I once again compromised my clean lined minimalist esthetics and purchased yet another leopard pimp-o-licious sleeping apparatus. The things I do for this cat, I tell ya.

I bring to you the Snoozen Tuben.

Coming up for air.

I thought its small snug composition would appeal to a cat who loves sleeping well covered under blankets. Let’s hope it works.

Happy Birthday Smellie Cat. I love you.

Snuggly but deadly.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-It's a Dog's Life Edition

I am thrilled to announce that Lulu has found a FANTASTIC forever home. When my friends, her foster mom and dad, saw her profile go back up on the rescue shelter website they realized they couldn't bear the thought of perhaps never seeing her again. Discussions ensued and they decided they couldn't let her go and that she has been where she really belonged all along. Lulu managed to meld into their family seamlessly. Clever girl! And I get to be The Benevolent Auntie any time I want. I've even received keys to their apartment so I can visit any time. It really doesn't get any better than this!

Snoozing with her new brother, Winston, who is obviously far more well adjusted than some other cat we know...*coughyoshicough*

Sharing couch time with her new sister, Xiola.


Getting her sea legs.


She and Xiola have become extremely close. My friend has been seeing special loving behavior from Xiola that she has never EVER seen her display towards any other of her doggy buddies. Lulu has developed so much self confidence being in Xiola's company. She is learning to trust and dig holes and play fight and be a lovely well rounded dog from her new best friend.


*brushing tears from my eyes* They are inseparable.


Here is Lulu looking forward to a bright future.

I know without a doubt that Lulu's life couldn't be any better.

Angst Is The New Black

Well…what do you know? It seems I have found myself right in the middle of a real live ker'fuffle. Boy-oh-boy, you have no idea what my day has been like.

It appears that The Jilted Adopters I posted about yesterday Googled my name and/or Lulu’s name and found my blog. Heeee! And of course the first thing I thought was, “Excellent!! Well I know what I’ll be blogging about tonight.” They read what I wrote about them and were very upset. So upset that they tattled about my blog to my friend who is fostering Lulu and the nice lady who runs the rescue shelter. Well, my friend reads me regularly and nothing I write surprises her anymore. I don’t know what The Nice Rescue Lady thought about this collection of my incoherent ramblings but she still stands behind me and my decision. I have always strictly adhered to a policy of never writing anything on my blog that I wouldn’t be 100% comfortable saying to anybody’s face and saying that I still firmly stand behind yesterday’s post.

I know they are upset. I know there were reasons why what happened happened. I know they are mad at me. I’d be mad at me too if I was in their shoes. I really would. I have no problem with their anger. It doesn’t bother me. None of that ultimately matters to me because for me all this has not been about emotions and whose feelings got hurt. It has been about getting Lulu into a fantastic home ASAP.

So, yes, they are upset and I’m told that they don’t feel that they have been given the opportunity to state their side of the story. Well, this is my blog for my opinions and if they want to start their own blog for theirs then they should. In fact I’d happily link to it. I have some blog domain name ideas for them. How about wehateherass.com or krankiisafuckinglyingwhorelady.com. I have absolutely nothing to hide. Seriously. I’ve always been open to finding out why things went wrong? You see, as well as finking about my blog they have also been sending detailed emails to my friend and The Nice Rescue Lady outlining in gory detail how I did them wrong. So while everybody else seems to be in the know about their side of the story they have never actually taken up their issues about me with me. I’ve not received copies of any of their complaints. And I can’t approach them as I was ordered by the husband in his nasty email to “NEVER” contact them again. Which I haven’t.

Here’s the thing. While I don’t have any copies in my possession of any of these emails they sent to other people about me I have been told a few particular items of interest. Now let me assure everybody that I would never have lightly or foolishly blogged about my experience if I didn’t follow some ground rules. I never identified anybody by name. I never identified anybody’s occupations or places of work. There is absolutely no way my silly little opinion, as misguided as it apparently is, could ever be traced to any particular person or people. And in addition to that I never said anything about the situation that I couldn’t back-up and prove outright with emails I sent and received. I could even promise that if it came to anything ugly phone records would prove my position as well. No, not the content of conversations but whether phone conversations ever took place. I hate to be cryptic here and I won’t get too detailed. He will know what I mean. How CSI, huh?

Hearing certain negative assertions about my conduct and how I supposedly threatened, harassed and pestered them that I know are blatantly untrue and can be totally disproved by the information I have in my possession only makes me laugh even harder. Like I am talking REALLY hard here. Like there is even milk coming out of my nose.

So on the off chance you guys are reading this *waves hello* please feel free to comment and/or post a link if you’d like to state your side of the story. From the very beginning all I ever wanted was to hear from you and be updated and kept abreast of your situation. But I warn you, please be very careful what you accuse me of. I, in all seriousness, suggest you go over the emails I sent and you sent and be very sure of what you are going to say about me in writing to post on the internet. I say this because if there are any untruths I will not hesitate to set the record straight.

I’ll say it one more time. I’ve kept every single email.

PS-I'll tell you all some good news tomorrow.

Nasty! Don't Mean a Thing!

In the two years I’ve been writing my blog I’ve never received an icky comment or shitty email. Everybody has been nothing but lovely, supportive and kind. So YAY! and Thank You! and all that because I think that kind of bad stuff, in large enough doses, could really get to a person after a while.

So imagine my surprise when a rather nasty email arrived in my inbox today. Not from a fellow blogger or internet troll but from the person who had been chosen to adopt Lulu.

I have spent the last week and an half fielding several emails per day from people who were eager and excited about the prospect of bringing Lulu into their homes. The rescue shelter where I adopted her from had very strict criteria to meet so most of these applicants were rejected. Friends of my friend who is fostering Lulu at the moment expressed interest and we encouraged them to apply to adopt Lulu. They did and the rescue shelter lady wasn’t sure they were the right match but my friend and I raved about them and promised that they’d be perfect. Against her better judgment she agreed to the adoption saying she trusted us.

And then the slow decline into hell began. The husband of the couple who seemed to be the spokesperson of the two was not the slightest bit excited when I called to let them know they had been accepted to adopt Lulu. In fact he brushed me off saying he’d call later and then didn’t. I emailed him asking for a date/timeline/ball-park estimate as to when they wanted to take Lulu with no reply. I asked for any kind of information at all about their intentions and got no reply. He did venture to say he wanted to take Lulu for the day to introduce her to their cat and then didn’t make arrangements to pick her up or even contact me to let me know what was happening. A complete no-show.

Well…I sent a very nice email expressing my concerns that there seemed to be some sort of disconnect and that I was not getting the information I needed to get them and Lulu together. I explained my obligations towards the rescue shelter and my responsibilities towards Lulu. I outlined how the payment of the adoption fee would work depending on how the adoption was arranged; immediate pick up or slow introduction into their home. I asked them to give me their thoughts and wishes so we could work together to get Lulu happy and settled.

I got no reply.

So I cancelled the adoption.

And when I emailed to tell them so I wasn’t so nice anymore. I certainly wasn’t rude but I made VERY clear the reasons why I was not going to adopt Lulu to them and nothing was sugar coated. I questioned why they had applied for Lulu in the first place. I explained what they should have done and what they didn’t do. I outlined the circumstances of their application and how my friend and I had stuck our necks out to get them accepted. I told them what an embarrassing and awkward situation they had put us in with the shelter. I said they owed my friend an apology as she had advocated for them very strongly and they let her down. I said they had let Lulu down as well.

Ok-maybe not the kind of email one wants to get but there were no profanities. No personal attacks. Just the irrefutable facts of the matter, my side of the situation and the predicament I was now in. Hell, I have the whole adoption exchange on email and words don’t lie! They totally blew me off.

And that is when the husband sent me the nasty email. It was personal, it was low, it was petty and it contained a very blatant lie. A horrible ass covering desperate lie. A lie that one shouldn’t commit to paper and send out into the world because it is gonna come back and bite you on that ass you are trying to protect.

Remember, I have all the emails...

The best part was that this nasty email was also really funny. I laughed out loud when I read it.

A couple years ago this email would have devastated me. I would have been agonizing that they didn’t liiiike meeee or that it was unnnnfaaaiiiirr. Not now. All those happy pills and hours of therapy have done the trick. And the best part is that a year of picking apart all my idiosyncrasies and issues with a therapist has given me the knowledge and insight to be able to pick apart the mental freakiness of others. And let me tell you this email was filled with all sorts of very interesting and telling things to pick apart. Veeeeery interesting. And that made it all the funnier.

Growing up so rocks.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-She's Baaaack

Top Dog Again

Plan B for Total BUMMER

Um…let’s just say I have been dreading writing this post. It has not been the best week and nothing happened the way I had hoped and, frankly, the way it was supposed to, DAMMIT.

Nothing at all.

Lulu did not work out. Or maybe I should rephrase that. Lulu worked out great. Yoshi stopped working all together.

Yoshi had, what I believe to be, a total feline nervous breakdown.

Now I know what many of you are thinking. Kranki, you total DUMBASS!!! Didn’t you think ahead about this? Didn’t you think this might happen?

I have to be honest with you. I thought about this a great deal and I thought up a whole bunch worse case scenarios but never dreamed what actually happened would happen. It never occurred to me. Obviously, if it had entered my mind I never would have brought a dog into my home. I'd seen Yoshi around dogs but obviously none had ever stayed for a sleepover.

This is what I imagined might happen with Yoshi:

-hissing
-growling
-yowling
-spitting
-swiping with paws-nails extended-possible bloodshed
-retaliatory peeing or pooping in favourite shoes/on bed/on dining room table
-moody self absorption and angst
-shunning of mommy love
-acting out and general bad behavior

What actually occurred with Yoshi:

-hissing
-growling
-yowling
-spitting
-swiping with paws-uncertain of nail position
-shunning of momma love
-COMPLETE CESSATION OF EATING FOR 4 DAYS!!
-COMPLETE CESSATION OF WATER CONSUMPTION FOR 4 DAYS!!
-PERSISTENT VOMITING LEADING TO TOTAL DEHYDRATION!!
-RIPPING OUT OF OWN FUR!!
-BITING WHEN TOUCHED!!!
-NO LONGER CLEANING HERSELF!!

By the time Thursday came along Yoshi was noticeably thinner, completely dehydrated, too weak to jump out of the dog’s reach, listless and looking really rough. I thought I’d have to take her to the vet which would have freaked her even more. It was really terrible.

I talked with a friend of mine who, while not a vet, bred and showed Persian cats for years as well as ran a boarding cattery. She said that all the above behaviors were not dangerous except for the vomiting part. Dehydration is very dangerous. Yoshi was barfing several times a day and I just didn’t know where it was all coming from because her food was completely untouched. She suggested I take Yoshi to the vet and get her put on tranqs. Another friend mentioned Prozac. The lady at the shelter where I got Lulu said I should just keep the cat in my bedroom from now on.

None of these were an option because until I brought a dog into the house Yoshi was perfectly fine. A little insane, yes, but overall quite fine. This was not her fault in any way and I wasn’t going to make her pay for my mistake. And it wasn’t Lulu’s either as she had been a perfect citizen in my home all along.

This was all my fault. And I felt like shit and continue to do so.

So that Thursday I took Lulu to my friend’s house who not only has a dog of her own but also dog-sits another small dog everyday. Yoshi started drinking later that day and started cleaning herself which I thought was a good sign. She continues to be super jumpy with any sudden movements or sudden noises. She no longer meets me at the door when I come home because she is afraid there might be a dog attached to me. She is eating roughly twice her usual amount and is putting weight back on again. She is doing fine.

Lulu is having a blast at my friend’s house. She is way more outgoing, happy and is very much in love with my friend’s dog. The shelter where I got Lulu is working to re-home her up here in Vancouver and I am helping with that. They are not angry with me as when I adopted Lulu I voiced my concerns about how Yoshi would cope and they were happy to give me a trial period to see what would happen. They just want the best home for Lulu too and obviously my home is not the right one.

But I REALLY wish it was because I just LOVE that dog.

So while I often sit and think about ways I could make it work I know deep down it isn’t going to. Maybe if I had a much bigger place where I could give one level to the cat and one to the dog it might be ok. But I don’t. I have a small apartment and we all have to live together.

So I fucked up. I made a huge mistake. I know, I know…I suck.

The Cutest and Sweetest Dog EVER!!!

The Jerk and Her Death Stare of Doggy Hatred

Operation Dog Adopter went off without a hitch. I present to you…LULU!!!!

THE EARS!!!!

This dog is the most mellow and sweet dog I have ever met. There is yet to be any barking and she is most happy sleeping. She is about 1 1/2 years old and we figure there is Chihuahua, Dachshund and maybe some Jack Russell in her. Poor thing was relegated to an outdoor kennel with her brother in her previous life so doesn’t really know how to walk on a leash or even sit. She doesn’t even know the word, “Treat!” However, she can play a mean game of fetch. When returning with the ball she often stops halfway and “dribbles” the ball between her front paws until she reaches you. So far she has been very intuitive about what I want her to do. She leaves the cat alone and has started playing with her toys and sleeping in her crate even though she didn’t show much interest in them yesterday. She used to eat out of a communal food bowl at the shelter so now she delicately takes a few pieces of kibble in her mouth and carries them to the dining room about 4 feet away where she eats them. I guess she didn’t like the insanity of the feeding frenzy and developed a peaceful way to eat. She has a little nick out of one of her ears due to getting frostbite in the sad unheated kennel in her old life. Every time I see it I get livid. Poor thing. She is also somewhat underweight. Despite her lonely life so far she is very submissive and eager to please. She loves to snuggle up and prop her head on my lap for snoozes. She is shy around new people but warms up almost instantly with some petting and scratches behind the ears. She is also a little nervous in the elevator and sits right between my feet for comfort. So far she is a lovely pooch.

The Very First Meeting

Cuddles

And Kisses

And how is Yoshi doing? Well…yesterday she acted scared and curious. Her tail was often fluffy but she circled Lulu like a shark trying to figure out what was going on. This behavior has now turned into outright hostility and Yoshi howls, growls and yeowls along with lots of hissing whenever the dog so much as looks at her. Yet she doesn’t seem scared. She just seems pissed now. But not pissed enough to not eat all the tuna I am feeding her or not watch the dog incessantly or not play with her Q-tips.

Lulu The Angel-By Michelle Davidson (who came with me on the adoption trip)

Right now Yoshi is in her Snoozen Housen while Lulu is in her Lulu Housen. So yes, I feel guilty as hell about Yoshi but it has been less than 24 hours and so far no bloodshed or poop gifties in my shoes. I think it’ll work out just fine.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Ch-ch-changes...

Enjoying her last couple days as The Only Child.

Poochie Lulu

Well, today is my birthday. I am 38 years old. And a scary indication of how old I am getting is that I forgot for about the first 30 minutes of the day that it was anything but a boring old Thursday. Forgetting my phone number and sitting in McDonalds nursing a single coffee for 6 hours is surely not far behind.

I spent my day primarily on the road running errands. Not just boring old errands like picking up dry cleaning or buying oven cleaner. We are talking about fun errands like buying rubber and squeaky toys and wildly trendy and appropriately expensive puppy-yuppy supplies for my soon to arrive new urban pooch.

Nine years ago I was given a fabulous gift for my birthday. I got Yoshi. Not actually on the day but a few months later once she had got her shit together and was born and weaned. I think it was mid May when I brought her home. And I have been firmly under her paw ever since.

So on Sunday I am driving down to Washington State to pick up Lulu. My birthday gift to myself. She is a whole lot of something including possibly dachshund and who knows what else. Frankly, she looks like she has been assembled from spare dog parts.

I love her already.

Wildly emotional and excessively soppy photo essay to come on Monday.

Meh...

*BIG SIGH*

Sorry about missing Crush Your Cat’s Head Friday but it was such a dark and dreary day and every photo I took of Yoshi looked terrible. Then she started getting really cranky because apparently the only thing worse than getting her picture taken is getting her picture taken multiple times with a flash. Plain and simple I gave up. I feared for my life.

The Doggy Adoption Saga continues. I sent in an adoption application to a rescue shelter in Yakima, Washington which was accepted. Yay! But then the dog I wanted to adopt was adopted by someone else mere hours before I applied. Boooooo! Then I found out that dog had a brother who was very cute in a troll-like sort of way and he was available to adopt. Yay! Then I got a phone call today from the nice lady who runs the adoption shelter and she said she wasn’t quite sure Norm, the Troll Dog, was quite right for me. Apparently he really likes to mark his territory and she knows I rent my very small apartment and that might not be too cool. Booooo! But then she said she had a couple other dogs that might interest me and I could see them when I came to see Norm. Yay! Then the weather has become quite snowy at the higher levels and the 10+ hour round trip involves driving over a high mountain pass. I doubt I could make it without a 4-wheel drive vehicle or at all with all the snow storms going on. Boooo!!

So….no dog…and no idea when it might happen.

Final rating: BOOOOOOO!!!

Poochless in Seattle

Pooch Watch 2007 has started with a whimper. I did not get the sweet dog I applied to adopt. It was a long shot but I had very much hoped I would be chosen. There are several things going against me as far as being a future dog owner.

First of all there are literally next to zero small dogs for adoption within a 100 mile radius of my city. While this is very good news showing that dog parents are living up to the responsibilities of their charges it means I am shit out of luck for a simple and easy adoption scenario. I called a nearby shelter today and they told me they hadn’t had a small dog for adoption in over a year. Mind you if I wanted a Rottie or a Pitt Bull there are hundreds of them available. However, I am smart enough to know they are too much dog for me.

I have to break here for a 'mo and tell you about the one single small dog available for adoption in a nearby city. It is a Yorkie that was picked up wandering the streets of L.A. He has no teeth, a bad heart, bad kidneys, incontinence, and only one eye. ONE EYE!!!! Doesn’t this story sound like a Quentin Tarantino movie? Seriously. Holy crap!

Ok, back to my whinge.

Another strike against me is that I live in an apartment and people with fenced yards always get priority in dog adoptions. This is very unfair as I live in a fabulous dog friendly neighbourhood surrounded by parks and trails in the woods. I also have a very large and secure roof garden for off leash fetch sessions. There is an off leash beach and park a 10 minute drive away. My building is exceptionally dog friendly with, I estimate, 40%-50% of tenants owning at least one dog. I was talking with a neighbour who said she tried to adopt a dog for several months and finally gave up and bought one. She loves her dog but thought it was crazy she was passed over due to the yard situation. Honestly, I think it can work out better for a dog because the fact that we live in an apartment and have to physically take a dog out for bathroom duties it ensures they get more productive walks versus a person who just lets a dog out into a yard to do its thing without any kind of interaction. I’m just saying…

So I looked in a couple of local papers for what sounded like reputable breeders and found that mixed breed small dogs cost about $1500 to buy while pure breeds cost about $3000. Well, that kind of purchase is not going to happen for me any time soon. Initially I thought that this range of prices would probably deter emotional and unsuitable purchasers which was a good thing for dogs in general but changed my mind when I saw how many pure bred large dogs are in shelters. We all know people often have more money than sense.

So I am being steered toward out-of-country adoption such as a lot of prospective parents do for non-furry children. Sadly, the US has loads of small dogs in shelters and rescues. In fact the sweet dog I applied for was located in Seattle, a 3-4 hour drive away. There are problems with this as well. Many rescue shelters do not adopt out to out-of-state or country applicants because doing home checks and after adoption checks are so time consuming and expensive. I can totally understand this but with the small dog shortage here they are missing out on a huge group of willing adopters. I have decided that if I do manage to adopt a dog from Washington State I will volunteer to perform home-checks for them in my area so they can facilitate more adoptions up here.

But saying that it can still be quite expensive to adopt a shelter or rescue dog from the US since they often charge adoption fees as high as $500. Take in account the exchange rate to Canadian funds along with at least two trips across the border using a few tanks of gas on top of all the supplies ones needs to get and obedience classes and a vet check needless to say it can get very pricey.

Now I know what a lot of you are saying. If I can’t afford to shell out aprox $1000 for a dog then I probably shouldn’t get one. Believe me I have taken that into consideration and totally understand this point of view. The fact is I can (with some recent lifestyle adjustments) afford supplies for a dog as well as a reasonable adoption fee. I can afford pet health insurance so I don’t have to worry about large vet bills and I can certainly afford food and an obedience class or two. What I don’t have is a huge lump sum to hand out all at once.

So the plan is this. I will continue to check local and US adoption sites on the internet and by phone. I will continue to contribute to my Poochum Fund so I can afford a higher adoption fee as the funds grow over the next few months. I will continue to be open to the whole process and see what comes my way. But I now realize I will have to be more patient. Waaaaayyyy more patient.

So thank you, Universe, for once again placing me in a situation where I become brutally aware of how grossly impatient I am. I’m working on this issue, honest! Cut me some slack.

In the meantime I am cuddling Yoshi and spoiling her rotten. Enabling her Q-Tip habit and lap addiction. Crushing her head any way I can think of.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Rebel Meow

Fauxhawk
When she dreams, runs around like a freak and eats her dinner she gets this funny hairdo.

Feeling Just Fine, Thanks.

Well another Valentine’s Day is here and yet again I am single for it. Unlike most single gals this doesn’t bother me in the least. I am honestly not the slightest bit lonely or upset about it. And I really couldn’t even tell you why except that I have never thought my single status reflected poorly on me. I have really never felt that I NEEEEEEDED a man to be happy. It is very true for me to say when I hear all the funny/weird/terrible relationship issues that my friends go through I just hang up the phone and feel nothing but relief that my life is not complicated that way. And I feel this relief far more than I have ever felt lonely. Perhaps I think this way because when I look back on my past serious relationships I mostly remember the hard times. The sad times. The times being lied to and cheated on. And worst of all feeling so lonely while being in a relationship. I have felt far lonelier with a man in my life than I have ever felt being single.

There is so much pressure to be hooked up in this world and I admit to feeling it sometimes. Especially lately now that I am the last single chick in my whole circle of friends. Everybody else is married/long termed hooked-up and all but three couples have kids. And one of those couples who don’t is working on changing that as I type. I do feel like the odd duck out but I cannot say that I look at any of my friends’ relationships and envy them. None would suit my needs and desires. I don’t covet anybody’s situation and am perfectly happy with my single status.

I’d even say I probably think it may be considered weirder that I am honestly happy being single than the fact I am without a man. Does that make sense? Everybody just expects that a single woman would be desperately looking for a guy. Simply, I am not and have no immediate plans to.

I just figure that if I go along with my life and do the stuff I love then I might meet somebody in my everyday routine. And if I don’t then….I don’t. Or maybe one day internet dating might pique my interest but not at this moment it doesn’t.

I do celebrate Valentine’s Day as my Dad has ALWAYS been my special guy so we exchange wee gifties. I got a lovely bunch of flowers from him today in beautiful pinks and purples. I feel very loved and cherished by him.

And this Valentine’s Day, unlike others in recent history, I am actually deeply in love. I fell hard over the weekend while looking at dog rescue sites and put in an application to adopt a Min Pin/Chihuahua mixed dog with the sweetest face I have ever seen. I have looked at dozens of dogs and most squeeze my heart. This little pooch actually made me weep when I saw her. Competition is fierce and I haven’t heard back yet if I even get an interview so please pray and send out good poochie vibes my way.

No matter if you are single or married or in that whole dating stage I hope your day is wonderful. Don’t wait for others to treat you well. Treat yourself well and you will never feel alone.

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-What a Pussy

I thought she might like some fresh air out on the balcony. Um...apparently not. It really isn't that cold out. Honest.

Throw Me a Bone...Or Not

Thank you all so much for your excellent advice about doggy adoption. I have still not made a definite decision either way but am still very open to the process. I have decided to go look at any dog that catches my eye. Hopefully on Friday I will get to meet Rockie, a 13 year old Pomeranian who is looking for a home to spend his remaining time in comfort and surrounded by love. I have to admit I had no particular affinity to Poms but his face is so sweet and he sounds mellow and loving. I’ll see what he is really like in person and if there is any connection between us and go from there.

Yesterday was my One Year Cancer Free Anniversary. Unfortunately I didn’t exactly get to celebrate it with wild abandon (or with hookers and blow) as I spent the day in the hospital getting a bone scan. I had a sore spot on my sternum on the side where my cancer was. The docs seemed to think it was cartilage inflammation but we decided a bone scan was needed to be sure. That is the big problem with cancer (the gift that keeps on giving) because you just can’t ignore stuff that you probably would attribute to normal aches and pains if you didn’t have a cancer history. The docs say to come in if you experience any unusual symptom or pain for more than 2 weeks.

So I asked the tech if she saw anything bad on the scan (even though I am not supposed to) and she told me everything looked clear (even though she is not supposed to) and we both promised not to rat each other out and I left feeling significantly better. I got home in the late afternoon and celebrated with tea and chocolate and hugs with Yoshi.

It was a good day.

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?

I want a dog. A pooch. A pooper. I have dreamed about owning a dog for years but I go back and forth and while every bone in my body aches for a canine buddy practicalities hold me back. Also The Great Unknown is daunting as I have never had a dog in my whole life. I really don’t know what to expect. I haven’t been exposed to a whole bunch of dogs so they are a bit of a mystery to me. However, I have never met a dog I didn’t like and I fuss over them like grannies do their scrumptious grandbabies.

When faced with a big decision I always write out a Pros and Cons list:

Pros

-Am home a lot for the next few months and when I start up my business I can take a dog to work if it is well socialized around people and other dogs.
-I live in a VERY dog friendly building.
-There is a small park nearby and a sea wall to walk along too.
-Watched the entire first season of The Dog Whisperer in one sitting.
-I have a friend who could dog-sit for me if I go out of town or even need a day to myself.
-My parents would love to walk the dog too.

Cons

-Since I am not working I really cannot afford any kind of new pet.
-Yoshi, my cat, might kill the dog. She is very unsocial.
-Very unsure about the whole housebreaking thing. I have light beige carpets too.
-I’ve never had a dog before. I might totally screw it up. Doggie therapy is expensive.
-Not thrilled about dog smell issues as well as cleanliness.
-Very squeamish about poop.
-Deep fear my lap will not be big enough for a very possessive cat and a new dog.
-I cannot afford to replace the couch if the dog eats it.
-I cannot afford to replace my boots and shoes if the dog eats them.
-Since I live in an apartment building a late night/early morn pee run means getting all dressed and going down an elevator and out to the grass. No letting the dog out in the yard wearing my Pjs.
-I am worried about who would take care of the dog if my cancer came back since I don’t have a boyfriend/husband to take over the responsibility.

I have thought that I should have a small dog for space reasons as well as poop reasons. Small dog + small poop = less gagging. I am also very open to older dogs as well as dogs with health problems like deafness or blindness but have decided that I cannot afford to provide long term vet services for a chronically ill dog.

So talk me into it or warn me off. Any thoughts? What do you think?

Crush Your Cat's Head Friday-Make Believe

Abominable Yoshiman in her Snow Cave